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Elon Musk Sold 10,000 Flamethrowers Through His Boring Co Website

Elon Musk Sold 10,000 Flamethrowers Through His Boring Co Website:  In addition to his electric cars, trucks, his boring company and space ventures, Elon Musk has now launched an actual functional flamethrower for consumers, of which he claims to have already sold 10,000 of the $500 weapons.  Now I get just as annoyed as anyone else when those Jehovah’s Witnesses come banging on my door peddling their Watchtower magazine - but isn’t this idea just a wee bit extreme?  On the other hand, an item like this could just be the perfect solution the next time President Trump decides to tell a member of his rotating staff - “you’re fired!”



Study Finds Women Find the Men Desired By Others More Attractive:  A new study published in Scientific Reports, found that women find men more attractive - once they find out he is desired by other women.  Hell, you don’t need to waste time and money on some fancy study to find that out, just talk to Stormy Daniels.




Trump Campaign Offers to Flash Names on Screen for $35 Donation:  According to a solicitation on Donald Trump’s campaign website, people who donate a minimum of $35 to his re-election campaign will have the opportunity of seeing their name flashed on the livestream during President Trump’s first State of the Union address.  Laugh if you want, but it might be a good idea to take him up on the deal - after all, Sarah Huckabee Sanders says the audience is expected to be the largest in human history.


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