You've Got to Be Kidding?

Yet Another Tragic Pandemic Tale From Right Out of LA:  Paid a visit the other day to an old friend named “Cliff,” who has a place up in the mountains overlooking LA.  As you can see, Cliff’s the kind of a guy who enjoys “living on the edge.”  Now, I realize we’re all supposed to be self-distancing these days, but I went over because Cliff was feeling really down - at least for a guy who lives way up.   Turns out, Cliff’s wife Mona - had suddenly left him.  Not intensionally, mind you - for you see, Mona was a sleep-walker.  Now, I know some of you are going to ask, why in the hell would a woman allow herself “fall” for a guy named Cliff - who lives off the side of a mountain?  Well, it’s like I told you, Mona was a sleep-walker - so I guess it was just a matter of physics. Anyway, while all this may seem like a really sad tale, it really isn’t.  That’s because it has a rather happy ending.  You see, I also have another friend, wh...

My Tale of Mystery and Intrigue in a Godforsaken Town They Call Bakersfield:   Over the years, I cannot begin to tell you how many times good, decent folks have come up to me and asked me to post something that could prove to them that there have actually been people who sincerely want to be in Bakersfield, California.   Well, I knew right away this was gonna be one tough assignment - but I've had them before.  So, I put aside my long-held plans to binge-watch old episodes of “My Mother the Car,” and began my fateful journey.  And my friends, it was a journey that would take me to places no self-respecting, decent human being should ever find themselves.  That’s right, I’m talking about Bakersfield.   Then, one chilly and windy, dark Bakersfield night - I got lucky.  No, you perverts, not THAT kind of lucky!  I was walking down one of those small, winding, little Bakersfield side streets, when I came upon this funky, little jazz club....