You've Got to Be Kidding?

The New Republic reports that former Trump White House advisor Stephen Miller and his litigious band of alt-right lawyers called “America First Legal” have filed a lawsuit with the Equal Opportunity Employment Commission against Kellogg's over a limited edition Pop-Tart commemorating LGBTQ Pride.   The group claims, "Kellogg's is yet another big corporation that will break the law and hurt its shareholders' interests to serve the twisted woke ideology of its officers and directors.” Gee, if you wanna talk about being “Woke,” this dude is literally suing a toasted pastry box.  Can you imagine being so whacked-out that you’re actually threatened by a rainbow-colored Pop-Tarts box?   All I can figure is he must have caught his wife in bed with a box of them.   Now, the question is, where does it all end?   I mean, if he’s suing Pop-Tarts, can Fruit Loops be that far behind?   Come on!   Cinnamon Toast Crunch are cannibals, and he's going after Pop-Tarts? ...

Residents of Jamestown Township in Michigan overwhelmingly voted down a ballot measure to fund their local library, after Christian Nationalists frightened residents by warning the library contains dangerous books that are sympathetic to LQBTQ culture.   The Christians claimed that simply by having LQBTQ-themed books on their shelves, demonstrates how the library is actually grooming kids to become gay.   In fact, the library director resigned in the spring, citing harassment amid claims she was "indoctrinating" children.   Along this same line, speakers at the recent CPAC conference in Dallas said shutting down public libraries should become a top priority for all Christians and Republicans who are serious about preventing the spread of this “Godlessness” across the nation. Gee, what fun it must be, growing up in a town like that - surrounded by meatheads who are so proud of voting to close down their only library - and thusly ensuring they will become collectively even ...

Politico has just published leaked photos of family values, LGBTQ-hating, White Christian Nationalist, US Congressman Madison Cawthorn (R-NC) at a party - wearing a black lace  brassiere , large sterling silver hoop earrings, and a silver necklace he held seductively between his teeth.   His right hand appears to be circling his nipple in an attempt to appear alluring.   Cawthorn   claims the pics are just a big “nothing burger,” taken at a party on a “vacation cruise.” Oh, I get it!  Things like cross-dressing are just fine if you’re totally wasted on some cruise ship, but “real life” gay and transgender people are “an affront to decency and to God?”  Gee whiz, who knew Evangelical White Christian Nationalists were totally cool with folks cross-dressing at drug-laden sex parties while they’re on vacation?  I guess I must have missed that lesson in bible study class.  Now, me suspects it’s a case of “ye who doth protest too much.”   That’s...

US Representative and QAnon conspiracy theorist Lauren Boebert (R-Co) stirred up quite a bit of controversy when she posted to Twitter “We require people to be 21 to purchase alcohol beverages, and 21 to purchase tobacco products,” therefore Americans should have to be at least 21-years-old before they can come out as LGBTQ, adding - especially as transgender. Says the person who married a guy convicted of exposing himself to minors!  I guess Boebert is of the belief that “sex education belongs in the bowling alley, NOT assigned in the classroom!”  I mean, seriously - if age were really an indicator of reaching sexual maturity, would that 24-year-old boyfriend you eventually married have exposed his penis to you and your underage girlfriends at a bowling alley?  Asking for a friend.  Funny thing about Republicans and “sexual maturity,” because a bill now making its way through the Republican Tennessee state legislature would establish a common-law marriage betwe...

Axios reports the Florida State Senate has just advanced a bill being referred to as the “Don’t Say Gay” bill, which allows parents to sue teachers for not telling parents about any teaching decisions that could “critically affect a student's mental, emotional or physical health, or wellbeing.”   The bill prohibits teachers from explaining to kids younger than ten “what homosexuality is,” but as written - could also include things such as “the trauma of receiving a vegetarian lunch” that the child didn't ask for. Gee, I guess in these folk’s minds, if you don't discuss homosexuality - then it simply doesn't exist.  Just like if you don’t take a COVID or a pregnancy test, then you can’t possibly be either COVID positive or pregnant.  Remember, it was none other than Donald Trump who once told staffers to stop the testing for COVID, and we’ll have far fewer cases to report.  That kind of logic’s pretty darn hard to argue with. Anyway, I’m certainly no legal eagle...