New Dinosaurs Being Discovered in Record Numbers

New Dinosaurs Being Discovered in Record Numbers:  Scientists say the frequency of new dinosaur discoveries has spiked dramatically in the past twenty years or so - and many of those new finds are dramatically changing everything we had previously thought we knew about these monstrous beasts.

You bet it is!  Let’s take for example the giant flying dinosaur named Pterodactylus.  Who could have known that the “P” in Pterodactylus is actually silent?  There was no indication of that in the fossil record until recently.  Or how about the fact that Bigfoot was actually only a size 8 shoe?  One may legitimately wonder why podiatrists have been silence on this issue for all these years.

Then, there’s the recently discovered fact that T. Rex was not a predator at all, but actually a scavenger who had feathers.  While I’m no paleontologist, I’m guessing that must mean that these theropods were essentially homeless, cross-dressers.  And who could have guessed a giant, monster with a name like “Godzilla" considered itself an atheist - or, at the very least - an agnostic?  

Now my guess is they’re eventually gonna find that it wasn’t an asteroid that killed off the dinosaurs, but smoking.  Most people don’t realize these beasts were extremely heavy smokers.  And they lived in an era long before there any warning labels on cigarette packs.  Let that set in for a minute.

Anyway, there are just so many unanswered questions, it can all seem a bit overwhelming for many of us.  Luckily, we here in America are very fortunate to have noted experts like Vice President Mike Pence around - who is not the least bit shy about explaining it all to us.

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