Skip to main content

Ohio Woman Finds Millard Fillmore Image in Her Grilled Cheese

Ohio Woman Finds Millard Fillmore Image in Her Grilled Cheese:  Mildred G. Higgenbottom, of Canal Fulton, Ohio was all set to dig into her traditional Saturday lunch of grilled cheese and tomato soup when she noticed what can only be described as none other than the image of former President Millard Fillmore - toasted right into the bread of her grilled cheese sandwich.
Well, as one can imagine, Ms Higgenbottom felt immediately felt torn between the need to show President Fillmore his due respect and her extreme hunger for grilled cheese.  Sure, part of her knew she should immediately take the necessary steps to preserve the sandwich for all posterity.  I mean, how often does a Millard Fillmore show up in a grilled cheese sandwich?  I don’t care what kind of bread you're using.  

On the other hand, she was feeling incredibly hungry and, let’s face it folks - Fillmore did croak one helluva long time ago.  If she gobbled that sandwich right down, who the hell’s gonna know the difference?  Besides, you don’t wanna just waste good Velveeta cheese.  As most everyone in Ohio knows, a brick of that stuff ain’t cheap.  Now the question is, who’s gonna show up next - Rutherford B. Hayes?

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Donald Trump Sporting Slick New Hairdo for UK Visit

Donald Trump Sporting Slick New Hairdo for UK Visit:   US President Donald Trump is showing off a shockingly new slicked-back hairdo, as he prepares to meet with the Queen during his first official state visit to the UK. Good God?  What the hell is that all about?  Is he trying to bring back the mullet?  Either that, or he’s secretly planning on entering a Gary Busey lookalike contest as soon as he gets to London. My guess is, he’s trying to put on his best bohunk sexy look for his meetup with the queen.  One thing’s for sure, he now actually looks exactly like the greasy, mob slime ball he tries to act like.  Maybe he figures that if he ever does get impeached, when they come to get him, no one will be able to recognize him.  But hell, even if he does get impeached, he’ll have nothing to worry as far as getting a job.  I mean, what respectable La Vegas used car lot wouldn’t wanna hire a guy who looks like that? https://ww...

Self-Described Prophet and Pastor Warns Critics They Risk Leprosy

Self-Described Prophet and Pastor Warns Critics They Risk Leprosy:   After numerous prophecies of his failed to materialize, resulting in various accusations of lies and fraud, self-described “prophet” and right-wing pastor Hank Kunneman of “One Voice Ministries” warned fellow Christians that they "better be very careful" about criticizing "prophets" like him, because "It's a dangerous place, and some of you might get leprosy.” Wow, leprosy?  That’s one helluva threat!  Now, while I wasn’t there, my guess is that it all came down something like this - some critic calls out God’s “prophet” Kunneman for his bogus claims, then further challenges him by declaring “You want a piece of me, then come and get it!”  Then God gave that critic leprosy - and that “piece of him” just fell right off. Now, on a personal note, I’ve also been a vocal critic of Kunneman’s ministry for a long time now, and I can happily report that I haven’t come down with “leprosy.”  Alth...

Mike Huckabee Claims COVID-19 Death Risk Small and Sin Risk Lethal

Mike Huckabee Claims COVID-19 Death Risk Small and Sin Risk Lethal:   Former Republican presidential candidate Mike Huckabee has stirred some controversy with medical professionals by claiming that the risk of death from coronavirus is very “minimal,” but “sin is 100% lethal. Oh, really Mike?  Then how about showing me a death certificate which lists “sin” as the primary cause of death.  Of course, the fact is, sin couldn’t be 100% lethal, or a guy like me wouldn’t even be alive to write this.   On the other hand, maybe you’re on to something Mike - and sin really is lethal, and I secretly used a “ghostwriter” to write this joke. https://www.johnnyrobishcomedy.com