Prolonged Phone Use Causing Horns to Grow Out of Young People’s Skulls: New research out of Australia in biomechanics suggests that young people are starting to develop bone spurs similar to “horns” in the back of their skulls - believed to be caused by looking down at their mobile phones for a prolonged period of time.
OK, we get it - young people get horny from looking at their smartphones. On the other hand, I’m sure most musicians would argue that something can’t seriously be considered a “horn," unless you can blow it.
The fact is, anthropologists suggest we may now be entering the next stage of human evolution - “Homo Erectus iPhoneus,” while New Age devotees believe this represents a new, human incarnation of the beloved Unicorn.
Meanwhile, Pentagon officials expressed concern that young people may follow our President’s lead and use these “bone spurs” as a way to get out of doing military service - pointing out that if all of our young people have bone spurs, who the hell is gonna fight Trump’s war with Iran?
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