Trump Demands Georgia Sec of State Find 11,800 Votes for Him

Trump Demands Georgia Sec of State Find 11,800 Votes for Him: Rather than denounce President Trump's demand that the Georgia Secretary of State Brad Raffensperger find 11,800 votes for him, many Republicans are instead only outraged that the call was recorded, including Georgia Republican Party chair David Shafer and former Rep. Kelli Ward (R-AZ), who is currently the Arizona chair of the Republican Party. Ward lashed out at Raffensperger on Twitter, claiming "I don’t record my calls with the President of the United States. It’s humbling to have the opportunity to speak with the leader of the free world. Betraying the trust of the honor of those conversations is abominable.”

Really? She’s seriously “honored" to get a call from Donald Trump? Why, I think I’d rather talk “Watchtower” with the Jehovah's Witnesses, who never fail to knock on my door early every Saturday morning, then have a conversation with Donald Trump. But, that’s just me.

So, let me get this straight, Trump is recorded committing a crime, and all the Republicans are upset about is that someone recorded it? “How dare you catch him red-handed! Why I never!” Why to hear Republicans tell it, all Trump asked was “Hey Brad, you don’t happen to have a spare 11,800 votes laying around do ya? I’m asking for a friend.”

That said, I fully understand how they must feel about secret recordings. Why, Republicans haven’t felt comfortable about being recorded, since the Nixon days. All I can say is, I hope this scandal doesn’t further delay those shiny new healthcare and infrastructure plans Trump’s been promising us. After all, time’s running out and we’ve been waiting four years now.

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Sen. Katie Britt Blames Biden for a Rape 20 Years Ago in Mexico

During what many are calling an absolutely insane rebuttal to President Biden’s “State of the Union” address, Sen. Katie Boyd Britt (R-Ala.), walked onto a studio sound stage (set up like an upper-middle-class kitchen) and began to link a harrowing account of a young woman’s sex trafficking and rape by a Mexican drug cartel, to Joe Biden’s immigration policies of the 2020s. She did this even though the abuse happened nearly 20 years ago and in Mexico - and at a time when Republican George W. Bush was president, not Joe Biden. The girl about whom Sen. Britt spoke - was thrown out of her house by her mother at age 12 and eventually “fell prey to a professional pimp.” There is no evidence that she was ever held by a drug cartel, as Katie claimed. In addition, the young victim testified that most of her clients for prostitution were foreigners visiting Mexico to have sex with underage girls. Okay, so now let me get this straight. A young Mexican fema...

GOP Lawmaker Says Trump’s Conduct Crosses Impeachment Threshold

GOP Lawmaker Says Trump’s Conduct Crosses Impeachment Threshold: Rep. Justin Amash (R-Mich.), has become the first Republican congressman to publicly state that, based on the Mueller Report - the President “engaged in impeachable conduct.” Rep. Amash further added that Attorney General Barr “deliberately misrepresented” the Mueller Report’s findings to congress and to the American public. Oh boy! One can only imagine the 3 AM tweet storm that’s gonna emanate from Trump’s porcelain throne over this level of betrayal. I’ll tell you another thing, disloyalty of this magnitude to the Cult of Trump isn’t likely to set well in America’s trailer parks either. But then again, what else is new? After all, Republicans have never viewed reality as being in their best interests. Now, I have no idea how all this is gonna finally go down, but I do know one thing - Justin Amash is definitely not gonna get an invite to Donald Trump's next wedding....

Nigerian President Denies Dying and Being Replaced by a Clone

Nigerian President Denies Dying and Being Replaced by a Clone: Speaking at a recent conference, Nigeria’s President Muhammadu Buhari denied claims that he had died and been replaced by a Sudanese impostor or a clone, breaking his silence on a rumor that has been circulating on social media for months. Wait a minute, I think I saw that movie - “ Weekend at Muhammadu’s. ” And, if I remember correctly - wasn’t it was a Sudanese actor who played the lead? Who do they think they’re kidding anyway? After all, I wasn’t born yesterday! Now, of course, I’m sitting out here in California - so I have no sure-fire way to confirm or deny all these rumors, but I do know one thing - if you can’t believe Nigerian e-mails and social media posts, what the hell can you believe? https://www.johnnyrobishcomedy.com

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