Insurrectionist Realtor Gets 60 Days After Boasting ‘Blondes Don’t Go to Jail’

Dallas-area realtor and MAGA insurrectionist Jenna Ryan, who flew to Washington, D.C. on a private jet and promoted her business as she live-streamed the Capitol riot January 6th, treating it all like a big joke by tweeting "Sorry I have blonde hair white skin a great job a great future and I'm not going to jail...I did nothing wrong,” - has been sentenced to 60 days in jail.

No kidding - the “bragging blonde” is actually on her way to jail? Wow, sounds like “orange is the new karma!” Well, I’m happy she’s headed to the clink, but come on! Hell, 60 days is hardly enough time for her cellmates to find out if she’s really even a true blonde. Perhaps that’s a good thing though, because I seriously doubt many jails would provide incarcerated blonde MAGA supporters with products to “bleach” their hair. That said, given she’s a Trump supporter, they might be persuaded to provide bleach as a COVID treatment, however.

Now, I’m sure many of you are wondering - how could she possibly only get 60 days for such a serious crime? Well, word has it she was originally busted for having an expired driver’s license, but she was able to plea bargain down to a much lesser charge of “trying to overthrow the Government of the United States.” Hell, at this rate, Kyle Rittenhouse will probably be getting a ticker-tape parade. Anyway, I suppose we should be grateful the judge was at least impartial enough that when he handed down Jenna Ryan’s sentence - he didn’t try and toss in a few Sephora gift certificates.

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