Skip to main content

GOP Senator Claims Joe Biden is the Reason Kansas is No Longer a Border State


During an interview with Fox News host Maria Bartiromo, it appears Republican Sen. Roger Marshall (R-KS) believes that Kansas has recently geographically moved away from the Mexican border, claiming that Joe Biden’s policies have migrants "stacked up" and waiting to enter the United States, and "this is why Kansas is no longer a border state.”

Gee, so Kansas was once a border state? Who knew?  Frankly, I’ve always assumed that if you’re traveling by tornado, it was located right next to the Land of Oz, but what do I know?  Anyway, it appears geography is another subject Kansas Republicans must have outlawed and discarded right along with that dreaded Critical Race Theory.  


Now, to quote the late, great Sam Cooke, it kind of sounds like Sen. Marshall “don’t know much about history, don't know much biology, don't know much about a science book.”  Of course, giving Sen. Marshall the benefit of the doubt, this may have been a feeble attempt to make a Civil War reference.  Even so, while Joe Biden is obviously pretty damned old, it would still be a real stretch to try and pin Civil War border issues on him.


Sen. Marshall went on to claim that during the Trump Administration, ranchers only found 2 dead immigrants on their land per year, but since Biden took office, one rancher found a hundred dead immigrants on his ranch.  Now, I seriously doubt if that’s true, but if there really were a hundred dead immigrants found on this guy’s ranch this year, then it seems to me that this dude is much more than just a rancher - he’s also a serial killer!


That said, and in Sen. Marshall’s defense, Kansas is actually bordered to the south by Oklahoma, which compared to most other states, is pretty much like a “foreign country.”  Either that, or geologists have somehow missed a massive tectonic plate shift of “biblical proportions.”  Then again, there’s always the possibility that Sen. Marshall is also “borderline” crazy.


Meanwhile, conservative Republicans are reportedly busy trying to make a few changes to the wording on the Statue of Liberty plaque that currently reads “Give me your tired, your poor, Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.”  The new, revised Republican version would add the phrase “Terms and conditions may apply!”


If you’ve enjoyed what you’ve just read, please consider joining me at:

Johnny Robish Comedy

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Sen. Katie Britt Blames Biden for a Rape 20 Years Ago in Mexico

During what many are calling an absolutely insane rebuttal to President Biden’s “State of the Union” address, Sen. Katie Boyd Britt (R-Ala.), walked onto a studio sound stage (set up like an upper-middle-class kitchen) and began to link a harrowing account of a young woman’s sex trafficking and rape by a Mexican drug cartel, to Joe Biden’s immigration policies of the 2020s.  She did this even though the abuse happened nearly 20 years ago and in Mexico - and at a time when Republican George W. Bush was president, not Joe Biden.  The girl about whom Sen. Britt spoke - was thrown out of her house by her mother at age 12 and eventually “fell prey to a professional pimp.”  There is no evidence that she was ever held by a drug cartel, as Katie claimed.  In addition, the young victim testified that most of her clients for prostitution were foreigners visiting Mexico to have sex with underage girls.   Okay, so now let me get this straight.  A young Mexican fema...

White House Calls Trump Property the Perfect G7 Meeting Location

White House Calls Trump Property the Perfect G7 Meeting Location:   The White House and President Trump are raising eyebrows once again after they selected Donald Trump’s National Doral Resort Hotel as the “perfect location” for the next G7 summit while also suggesting President Trump plans to re-invite Russian President Vladimir Putin to the meeting.  Well gee-whiz, what a lucky break for the Trump Resorts.  I mean, who knew there was no other place in the entire United States that would be appropriate to hold a G7 summit other than a Trump property?  Imagine that! Of course, at the rate Trump has been betraying all our friends and allies, by the time this conference actually rolls around - my guess is it’s likely only gonna be a G2 summit - with just Trump and Putin in attendance! https://www.johnnyrobishcomedy.com

Trump Claims Bahamas are Full of Bad Gang Members

Trump Claims Bahamas are Full of Bad Gang Members:   President Trump shocked reporters by telling them that he is hesitant to allow any Bahamians to enter the US after Hurricane Dorian, because the island is full of "bad gang members.” Right, “bad gang members.”  That’s as opposed to all the “good gang members” who follow him.  You know, like the KKK, the neo-Nazis and all those white-supremacist militia gangs. But come on, if Trump really thought that there’s all these “bad guys” roaming around in the Bahamas, you’d think he’d have invited them to meet with him at Camp David by now. That said, my guess is that about the only thing Donald Trump actually knows about the Bahamas is that it’s surrounded bigly, by a Yuge bunch of water. https://www.johnnyrobishcomedy.com