Skip to main content

SpaceX Flight Attendant Says Musk Exposed Himself - Then Offered to Buy Her a Horse


A report has surfaced that billionaire Elon Musk exposed himself to a former SpaceX flight attendant while on his private jet.  The report claims Musk exposed himself to her and then offered to give her a horse in exchange for sexual favors.  The incident allegedly took place in a private cabin on the aircraft en route to London in 2016.  Musk rubbed the woman's leg and pleaded for a sexual massage, which she firmly declined.  The details of the offense were laid out in a signed declaration, with Musk’s aerospace company SpaceX paying out $250,000 in 2018 to settle her sexual misconduct allegations - with the hope it would all go away.

So, let me get this straight.  We have a jackass, offering to buy a woman a horse?  Gee, that’s a switch!  Of course, because it’s Elon Musk - you’re not getting the entire horse, you’re only getting the “horse's ass.”  All I can say is, let’s hope it wasn’t the horse I bet on in the Kentucky Derby.  The poor thing looked pretty constipated.  


Ironically, Musk just announced via a video conference call, that he can no longer vote Democrat and is now a Republican.  Guess this sexual assault allegation was needed to prove to conservatives that he is really serious about becoming a Republican.  Well, now that he passed that test, he’ll certainly rank high among possible GOP candidates for president in 2024.


Anyway, back to the incident - so apparently Musk grabbed the poor woman’s leg, exposed himself, and then offered to buy her a frigg’in horse?  Wow, that’s some “fancy billionaire foreplay” if you ask me.  Who knew the world’s richest man would try the old ”Be nice to me little girl, and I'll buy you a pony” line.  


Frankly, I’d like to hear what the ”horse” thinks about all this, but who knows if Marjorie Taylor Greene is even available for comment.  Of course, expect Elon Musk to claim it was all just “horseplay,” and that he was just trying to show this SpaceX employee his “rocket.”  Hell, sounds like Louis C.K. is only a couple of billion dollars away from everything being forgiven for him too. 


Gee, I guess this means that being a multi-billionaire doesn’t automatically make you a great guy after all.  Meanwhile, while Elon Musk tries to finagle his way out of this mess, expect Donald Trump to start bragging about how he makes way better “hush money deals” than Elon Musk does.  Apparently, some things never change.


If you’ve enjoyed what you’ve just read, please consider joining me at:

Johnny Robish Comedy

Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Trump Lawyer Schoen Threatens America With Civil War

Trump Lawyer Schoen Threatens America With Civil War:  In a fiery speech, arguing that impeachment would disenfranchise Donald Trump’s supporters, defense lawyer David Schoen is being harshly criticized for his thinly veiled threat - warning that impeaching the former president could very well result in even more violence from Donald Trump’s easily enraged base. So, if I understand Schoen’s argument correctly, it sounds as if he’s implying that “if you bring Trump to trial, then that angry, violent mob who attacked the Capitol, wanting to hang Vice President Pence and kill various members of Congress, might get really, really mad again - and there will be reprisals.”   You know, we’re talking stuff like ”Nice country you have here - be a damn shame if something were to happen to it!”  In other words, Schoen’s trying to incite violence, in defense of a man who’s facing trial - over inciting violence.  They don’t teach you that in law school.   Now, is it jus...
Post a Comment
Read more

Trump Returns to Do White House Coronavirus Briefings Solo

Trump Returns to Do White House Coronavirus Briefings Solo:  Three months after he abandoned the daily virus briefings and attempted to turn the country’s attention to what he described as the “great American comeback,” President Trump took the lectern in the White House briefing room alone on Tuesday, free to say whatever he wanted without any distractions from the usual bunch “sciencey nerds” behind him. And, in a rare moment of candor, Trump reluctantly admitted that the spread of the coronavirus will likely get worse before it gets better, and that people should probably wear masks.  Well said Mr President!  The fact is, most of us are already rather optimistic things will begin to get better - sometime after November 3rd. Ironically, now that Trump is finally admitting the virus is spreading fast and that people should wear masks, you’d think most of those armed militia thugs, whom Trump egged on to to out and “liberate” those Democratic run states from t...
Post a Comment
Read more

Scientists Monitoring Near-Earth Asteroid 99942 Apophis

Scientists Monitoring Near-Earth Asteroid 99942 Apophis:   Scientists meeting this week at the 2019 Planetary Defense Conference, say they’re monitoring the 99942 Apophis asteroid which will be coming within 20,000 miles (33,000 kilometers) of the Earth’s surface in just 10 years.  The thing is, by the year 2029, Trump will likely be settling into his 4th term - so if an asteroid suddenly threatens to destroy the Earth, my guess is that after 16 years of Trump, no one will really much care. https://www.johnnyrobishcomedy.com  Oldest Human Footprint Found in the Americas Confirmed in Chile:   Researchers say a 15,600-year old footprint discovered by a student in southern Chile is believed to be the oldest human footprint ever found in the Americas.  Oddly enough, scientists say the footprint appears to be that of someone wearing size 12 Bruno Magli shoes, but because it’s from well over 15K years ago - they’re rather doubtful it has any connection to t...
Post a Comment
Read more