Sylvester Stallone Asks Trump To Pardon Boxer Jack Johnson

Sylvester Stallone Asks Trump To Pardon Boxer Jack Johnson: After receiving a phone call from his loyal supporter Sylvester Stallone, President Trump tweeted that he’s now considering issuing a presidential pardon for former heavyweight boxing champion Jack Johnson, who was convicted under the Mann Act of transporting his white girlfriend across state lines.

Gee, who knew Donald Trump was a Jack Johnson admirer? Its almost beginning to sound like President Trump really does care about black people - or at least those who’ve been dead for 75 years. Of course, in Trump’s defense - its probably a pretty safe bet to assume he has no idea whether or not Jack Johnson’s even dead.

But why now - and out of the blue - all of a sudden? I’m sure it didn’t have anything to do with stealing some of the thunder away from former First Lady Barbara Bush’s funeral. And gee, wonder if Trump’s Jack Johnson enthusiasm would’ve have been quite as strong had it been Robert De Niro instead of Sylvester Stallone bringing up the pardon? That said, what I find rather odd is why Trump’s close pal Frederick Douglass never mentioned it to him before?

Anyway, after the Johnson pardon, my guess is that the President’s next big humanitarian move will be to pardon all the Salem witches. After all, how many times have we all heard the President ranting about how much he hates “witch hunts?”

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Marjorie Taylor Greene Claims Pete Buttigieg Emasculating Driving With Electric Cars

During a segment on Neil Cavuto’s Fox News program, US Transportation Secretary Pete Buttigieg was told by the host that Marjorie Taylor Greene is claiming "Mr. Buttigieg is trying to emasculate the way we drive" by supporting electric vehicles. In response, Buttigieg told Cavuto that “my sense of manhood is not connected to whether my vehicle is fueled by gasoline, or whether it's fueled by electricity.” When asked by Cavuto if he was offended by what Greene said, Buttigieg remarked "To be honest, there are other members of Congress that I pay more attention to when I'm thinking about opinions that really matter.” Oh, come on now! Let’s get real. It would take a helluva lot more than an electric car to “emasculate” Marjorie Taylor Greene. Besides, I’m pretty sure “real men” actually ride horses, anyway. Of course, I’m certainly no psychiatrist, but it sounds like Greene’s anger could be a combination of both “road rage” and “roid rage,” leaving her...

Trump Takes to Truth Social to Spread ‘Roomer’ About Ron DeSantis

Former president Donald Trump just shared some juicy gossip about Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis on his Truth Social platform. Trump posted, “Roomer (sic) are (sic) strong in political circles that Ron DeSanctimonious, whose Presidential run is a shambles, and whose poll numbers have absolutely crashed, putting him 3rd and 4th in some states, will be dropping out of the Presidential race in order to run, in Florida, against Rick Scott for Senate. Now that’s an interesting one, isn’t it?” Gee, Donald Trump spreading “roomers?” Say it ain’t so! Now, me thinks perhaps that prestigious Wharton School of Business Trump attended might want to consider adding some basic 3rd-grade spelling classes to its curriculum. Apparently, Trump is stalled at that level of language development where he is still spelling words phonetically. Why his poor spelling makes him look like a real “looser.” Frankly, I’m not sure its a wise choice for Republicans to choose ...

Mike Huckabee Claims COVID-19 Death Risk Small and Sin Risk Lethal

Mike Huckabee Claims COVID-19 Death Risk Small and Sin Risk Lethal: Former Republican presidential candidate Mike Huckabee has stirred some controversy with medical professionals by claiming that the risk of death from coronavirus is very “minimal,” but “sin is 100% lethal. Oh, really Mike? Then how about showing me a death certificate which lists “sin” as the primary cause of death. Of course, the fact is, sin couldn’t be 100% lethal, or a guy like me wouldn’t even be alive to write this. On the other hand, maybe you’re on to something Mike - and sin really is lethal, and I secretly used a “ghostwriter” to write this joke. https://www.johnnyrobishcomedy.com

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