Dennis Rodman Heading to Singapore for US-North Korea Summit

Dennis Rodman Heading to Singapore for US-North Korea Summit: Former NBA star Dennis Rodman says he will be heading to Singapore for the planned summit between Donald Trump and North Korean leader Kim Jong Un. OK, but I think a lot of us would feel a wee bit more comfortable if Scott Baio, Roseanne and Dennis Miller also went along - just in case their expertise is needed.

http://www.johnnyrobishcomedy.com

Data Shows Mars Once Had the Ingredients Needed for Life: NASA’s Mars rover Curiosity has detected organic compounds on the surface of Mars and seasonal fluctuations of atmospheric methane in findings that mark some of the strongest evidence ever that Earth’s neighbor may have harbored life. Interesting fun fact - Mars was once a thriving society until they made the mistake of appointing a Scott Pruitt to head up the Martian Environmental Protection Agency.

http://www.johnnyrobishcomedy.com

MIT Professors Say Humans Learned to Talk From Birds: Two professors at the MIT say they believe humans leaned to talk by listening to the birds. Yea, well judging from some of the conversations I hear, they must have been Coo Coo birds.

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Trump Takes to Truth Social to Spread ‘Roomer’ About Ron DeSantis

Former president Donald Trump just shared some juicy gossip about Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis on his Truth Social platform. Trump posted, “Roomer (sic) are (sic) strong in political circles that Ron DeSanctimonious, whose Presidential run is a shambles, and whose poll numbers have absolutely crashed, putting him 3rd and 4th in some states, will be dropping out of the Presidential race in order to run, in Florida, against Rick Scott for Senate. Now that’s an interesting one, isn’t it?” Gee, Donald Trump spreading “roomers?” Say it ain’t so! Now, me thinks perhaps that prestigious Wharton School of Business Trump attended might want to consider adding some basic 3rd-grade spelling classes to its curriculum. Apparently, Trump is stalled at that level of language development where he is still spelling words phonetically. Why his poor spelling makes him look like a real “looser.” Frankly, I’m not sure its a wise choice for Republicans to choose ...

Mike Huckabee Claims COVID-19 Death Risk Small and Sin Risk Lethal

Mike Huckabee Claims COVID-19 Death Risk Small and Sin Risk Lethal: Former Republican presidential candidate Mike Huckabee has stirred some controversy with medical professionals by claiming that the risk of death from coronavirus is very “minimal,” but “sin is 100% lethal. Oh, really Mike? Then how about showing me a death certificate which lists “sin” as the primary cause of death. Of course, the fact is, sin couldn’t be 100% lethal, or a guy like me wouldn’t even be alive to write this. On the other hand, maybe you’re on to something Mike - and sin really is lethal, and I secretly used a “ghostwriter” to write this joke. https://www.johnnyrobishcomedy.com

Trump Ordered by Jury to Pay E. Jean Carroll $83 Million

In his second trial in less than a year on the matter, a civil jury in Manhattan took only three hours to decide that disgraced former President Trump must pay $83.3 million in punitive and compensatory damages to rape victim and writer E. Jean Carroll in a drama that began in the dressing room of a New York City department store back in 1995. Gee whiz, $83 million? Seems it turns out that even “when you're a star, they don't always let you do it.” Anyway, so the Orange God used his big fat mouth to talk his way out of a $5 million judgment - and right into an $83 million judgment. Now, that really takes some skill! Talk about “The Art of the Deal!” I’m totally impressed. Why, its almost as if Mr. Trump and his militant, useless attorney don’t fully comprehend the basic point of “punitive damages.” I mean, at this point, Trump defames Ms. Carroll so frequently, she’s almost gonna need to put up an electronic signboard to alert the court abo...

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