New Civil War Memorial to Include Sculptures of Lincoln and Booth

New Civil War Memorial to Include Sculptures of Lincoln and Booth: While the rest of the nation is engaged in deep discussions over the statues and monuments of the Civil War, the town of Taneytown, Md is considering building a new memorial - one that would include not only Union heroes such as Lincoln and Grant, but also Confederate icons such as Robert E Lee and none other than Lincoln assassin John Wilkes Booth.

Perfect! Hell, Taneytown is only about 15 miles from Camp David - why Donald Trump could easily drop by and pay a visit when he’s in the neighborhood to highlight the “there’s good people on both sides” aspect of the memorial for visitors.

But, come on, why stop there? I mean, if you’re gonna build a memorial that includes John Wilkes Booth, then why not a statue of Osama bin Laden in New York City or how about a Lee Harvey Oswald memorial in Dallas? Hell, I don’t even remember who knocked off Garfield and McKinley anymore, but I’m sure they must have admirers somewhere. As you can see, the possibilities for building memorials seems endless.

But what confuses me is, why would these Trump supporters want a memorial for the losers? Why I thought Republicans didn't believe in giving losers participation trophies. My, my - how times have changed. Anyway, word has it that if approved by the Taneytown city council, the memorial could be completed sometime during Trump’s second term - in Federal prison.

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Sen. Katie Britt Blames Biden for a Rape 20 Years Ago in Mexico

During what many are calling an absolutely insane rebuttal to President Biden’s “State of the Union” address, Sen. Katie Boyd Britt (R-Ala.), walked onto a studio sound stage (set up like an upper-middle-class kitchen) and began to link a harrowing account of a young woman’s sex trafficking and rape by a Mexican drug cartel, to Joe Biden’s immigration policies of the 2020s. She did this even though the abuse happened nearly 20 years ago and in Mexico - and at a time when Republican George W. Bush was president, not Joe Biden. The girl about whom Sen. Britt spoke - was thrown out of her house by her mother at age 12 and eventually “fell prey to a professional pimp.” There is no evidence that she was ever held by a drug cartel, as Katie claimed. In addition, the young victim testified that most of her clients for prostitution were foreigners visiting Mexico to have sex with underage girls. Okay, so now let me get this straight. A young Mexican fema...

GOP Lawmaker Says Trump’s Conduct Crosses Impeachment Threshold

GOP Lawmaker Says Trump’s Conduct Crosses Impeachment Threshold: Rep. Justin Amash (R-Mich.), has become the first Republican congressman to publicly state that, based on the Mueller Report - the President “engaged in impeachable conduct.” Rep. Amash further added that Attorney General Barr “deliberately misrepresented” the Mueller Report’s findings to congress and to the American public. Oh boy! One can only imagine the 3 AM tweet storm that’s gonna emanate from Trump’s porcelain throne over this level of betrayal. I’ll tell you another thing, disloyalty of this magnitude to the Cult of Trump isn’t likely to set well in America’s trailer parks either. But then again, what else is new? After all, Republicans have never viewed reality as being in their best interests. Now, I have no idea how all this is gonna finally go down, but I do know one thing - Justin Amash is definitely not gonna get an invite to Donald Trump's next wedding....

Nigerian President Denies Dying and Being Replaced by a Clone

Nigerian President Denies Dying and Being Replaced by a Clone: Speaking at a recent conference, Nigeria’s President Muhammadu Buhari denied claims that he had died and been replaced by a Sudanese impostor or a clone, breaking his silence on a rumor that has been circulating on social media for months. Wait a minute, I think I saw that movie - “ Weekend at Muhammadu’s. ” And, if I remember correctly - wasn’t it was a Sudanese actor who played the lead? Who do they think they’re kidding anyway? After all, I wasn’t born yesterday! Now, of course, I’m sitting out here in California - so I have no sure-fire way to confirm or deny all these rumors, but I do know one thing - if you can’t believe Nigerian e-mails and social media posts, what the hell can you believe? https://www.johnnyrobishcomedy.com

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