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White House Discloses Trump Called Putin the Day of Democratic Debates:  While everyone was busy watching the Democratic primary debate Wednesday night, the White House decided it might be a good moment to disclose that President Donald Trump called his Russian counterpart Vladimir Putin, allegedly to offer help with putting out wildfires in Siberia.  Gee, funny how Trump didn’t seem to have quite the same compassion about those deadly wildfires in California last year, blaming Californians for not raking their forests.  Wonder if he gave the same scolding to Vlad and his boys?


Greenland Ice Sheet Dumped 197 Billion Tons of Water Into Atlantic:  In a startling revelation, scientists report that the Greenland ice sheet poured over 197 billion tons of water into the North Atlantic in July alone.  Wow, I guess that explains that tsunami which just injured all those people at that water park.


Magic Mushrooms May Replace Antidepressants in Five Years:  Hallucination-inducing drugs like magic mushrooms could be about to break big pharma’s stranglehold on the hugely lucrative market for antidepressants, as new trials are showing that psilocybin, the psychoactive component in magic mushrooms, to be highly effective in treating depression by apparently “resetting the brain.”  Sadly, I’ve hit my brain’s “reset button” so many times already, that the manufacturer’s now claiming the warranty’s no longer valid.

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