Treasury Department Orders Trump’s Name Printed on Stimulus Checks

Treasury Department Orders Trump’s Name Printed on Stimulus Checks: In an unprecedented move, the Treasury Department has ordered that Donald Trump’s name be printed on all stimulus checks that the Internal Revenue Service is rushing to send out, a move which will likely even further delay their delivery.

Now wait a minute, Trump’s gonna be the one signing these checks? Don’t Donald Trump’s checks usually bounce? Why, that’s just insane sending out paper checks with Trump’s signature on them! On the other hand, I suppose it does kinda make sense. After all, we do have a national shortage of toilet paper.

Hell, and while they’re at it, Treasury might just as well add the phrase "In Morons We Trust,” right above Trump’s image on the back of the checks. So, what the hell are they planning on paying us in anyway - rubles?

Besides, what I really wanna know is, how the hell can a guy who doesn’t even pay any taxes - sign US Treasury checks? If you ask me, Pelosi ought to prank the half-wit. Have her tell him that “legally, all these checks need to be signed by hand.” That ought to make him twice.

Now, if it were all up to me, I’d make Trump sign all the damn death certificates instead of these stimulus checks. After all, he sure had a helluva lot more to do with all of those.

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