Skip to main content

Asteroid Headed Toward Earth a Day Before the November Elections

Asteroid Headed Toward Earth a Day Before the November Elections:  In case you haven’t had enough excitement this year, NASA just announced that an asteroid is headed towards Earth, and is expected to arrive one day before the U.S. elections take place in November, though it’s believed the probability of it actually hitting Earth is relatively small.  In fact, even less than the Post Office delivering your mail-in ballot on time.

Really?  Now, just what in the hell are we supposed to do about an asteroid heading our way?  Hey, I got an idea!  Wonder if the President could talk Putin into poisoning it?  Either that, or have Trump break out one of his famous sharpies - and simply change the asteroid’s trajectory. 


Anyway, not to be negative about 2020 or anything, but now humanity is gonna be forced to figure out how to rid ourselves of one big asteroid and one big asshole - and all in just 24 hours!  And, while I’m certainly no expert on these matters, this sure like a job for “Space Force!”


In the meantime, it now appears two hurricanes are heading straight toward us - and at the same time!  In addition, Death Valley just registered a temperature of 130F the other day, only two degrees below the “hottest temperature ever recorded on Earth.”  Soooooo, I guess you can say, there’s at least been some good news in 2020.


https://www.johnnyrobishcomedy.com

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Sen. Katie Britt Blames Biden for a Rape 20 Years Ago in Mexico

During what many are calling an absolutely insane rebuttal to President Biden’s “State of the Union” address, Sen. Katie Boyd Britt (R-Ala.), walked onto a studio sound stage (set up like an upper-middle-class kitchen) and began to link a harrowing account of a young woman’s sex trafficking and rape by a Mexican drug cartel, to Joe Biden’s immigration policies of the 2020s.  She did this even though the abuse happened nearly 20 years ago and in Mexico - and at a time when Republican George W. Bush was president, not Joe Biden.  The girl about whom Sen. Britt spoke - was thrown out of her house by her mother at age 12 and eventually “fell prey to a professional pimp.”  There is no evidence that she was ever held by a drug cartel, as Katie claimed.  In addition, the young victim testified that most of her clients for prostitution were foreigners visiting Mexico to have sex with underage girls.   Okay, so now let me get this straight.  A young Mexican fema...

White House Calls Trump Property the Perfect G7 Meeting Location

White House Calls Trump Property the Perfect G7 Meeting Location:   The White House and President Trump are raising eyebrows once again after they selected Donald Trump’s National Doral Resort Hotel as the “perfect location” for the next G7 summit while also suggesting President Trump plans to re-invite Russian President Vladimir Putin to the meeting.  Well gee-whiz, what a lucky break for the Trump Resorts.  I mean, who knew there was no other place in the entire United States that would be appropriate to hold a G7 summit other than a Trump property?  Imagine that! Of course, at the rate Trump has been betraying all our friends and allies, by the time this conference actually rolls around - my guess is it’s likely only gonna be a G2 summit - with just Trump and Putin in attendance! https://www.johnnyrobishcomedy.com

GOP Lawmaker Says Trump’s Conduct Crosses Impeachment Threshold

GOP Lawmaker Says Trump’s Conduct Crosses Impeachment Threshold:   Rep. Justin Amash (R-Mich.), has become the first Republican congressman to publicly state that, based on the Mueller Report - the President “engaged in impeachable conduct.”  Rep. Amash further added that Attorney General Barr “deliberately misrepresented” the Mueller Report’s findings to congress and to the American public. Oh boy!   One can only imagine the 3 AM tweet storm that’s gonna emanate from Trump’s porcelain throne over this level of betrayal.  I’ll tell you another thing, disloyalty of this magnitude to the Cult of Trump isn’t likely to set well in America’s trailer parks either.   But then again, what else is new?  After all, Republicans have never viewed reality as being in their best interests.  Now, I have no idea how all this is gonna finally go down, but I do know one thing - Justin Amash is definitely not gonna get an invite to Donald Trump's next wedding....