Trump Felt Paying Off Stormy Daniels Was Cheaper Than Paying Off Melania

Trump Felt Paying Off Stormy Daniels Was Cheaper Than Paying Off Melania: A leaked excerpt from Michael Cohen’s new tell-all book, claims Donald Trump felt that paying hush-money to adult film star Stormy Daniels would be a helluva lot cheaper than paying off Melania, calling the $130,000 just “pocket change” and adding that his supporters might think it was super "cool” if they found out he slept with a porn star.

Cool indeed! Because, as we all know, porn stars are “extremely picky" about who they have sex with. Sadly though, those Trump supporters can basically forget about that “cool factor.” The truth is, Trump paid Stormy off to keep her mouth shut during the election - not for the sex.

So, the bottom line is, we have a President, beloved by the evangelical Christian crowd - who ranks women by how much it costs to sleep with them. That sure ought to boost his standing with female voters, or at least with the ones who’ve never completed 5th grade.

Anyway, on a positive note - at least Stormy actually got paid for the services she rendered, which is certainly a helluva lot better than most vendors who’ve dealt with Trump have fared. Now, the only question that remains unanswered is, will the IRS allow the President to claim that $130,000 pornstar payoff - as a tax deduction?

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GOP Lawmaker Says Trump’s Conduct Crosses Impeachment Threshold

GOP Lawmaker Says Trump’s Conduct Crosses Impeachment Threshold: Rep. Justin Amash (R-Mich.), has become the first Republican congressman to publicly state that, based on the Mueller Report - the President “engaged in impeachable conduct.” Rep. Amash further added that Attorney General Barr “deliberately misrepresented” the Mueller Report’s findings to congress and to the American public. Oh boy! One can only imagine the 3 AM tweet storm that’s gonna emanate from Trump’s porcelain throne over this level of betrayal. I’ll tell you another thing, disloyalty of this magnitude to the Cult of Trump isn’t likely to set well in America’s trailer parks either. But then again, what else is new? After all, Republicans have never viewed reality as being in their best interests. Now, I have no idea how all this is gonna finally go down, but I do know one thing - Justin Amash is definitely not gonna get an invite to Donald Trump's next wedding....

Self-Described Prophet and Pastor Warns Critics They Risk Leprosy

Self-Described Prophet and Pastor Warns Critics They Risk Leprosy: After numerous prophecies of his failed to materialize, resulting in various accusations of lies and fraud, self-described “prophet” and right-wing pastor Hank Kunneman of “One Voice Ministries” warned fellow Christians that they "better be very careful" about criticizing "prophets" like him, because "It's a dangerous place, and some of you might get leprosy.” Wow, leprosy? That’s one helluva threat! Now, while I wasn’t there, my guess is that it all came down something like this - some critic calls out God’s “prophet” Kunneman for his bogus claims, then further challenges him by declaring “You want a piece of me, then come and get it!” Then God gave that critic leprosy - and that “piece of him” just fell right off. Now, on a personal note, I’ve also been a vocal critic of Kunneman’s ministry for a long time now, and I can happily report that I haven’t come down with “leprosy.” Alth...

Nigerian President Denies Dying and Being Replaced by a Clone

Nigerian President Denies Dying and Being Replaced by a Clone: Speaking at a recent conference, Nigeria’s President Muhammadu Buhari denied claims that he had died and been replaced by a Sudanese impostor or a clone, breaking his silence on a rumor that has been circulating on social media for months. Wait a minute, I think I saw that movie - “ Weekend at Muhammadu’s. ” And, if I remember correctly - wasn’t it was a Sudanese actor who played the lead? Who do they think they’re kidding anyway? After all, I wasn’t born yesterday! Now, of course, I’m sitting out here in California - so I have no sure-fire way to confirm or deny all these rumors, but I do know one thing - if you can’t believe Nigerian e-mails and social media posts, what the hell can you believe? https://www.johnnyrobishcomedy.com

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