Trump Felt Paying Off Stormy Daniels Was Cheaper Than Paying Off Melania

Trump Felt Paying Off Stormy Daniels Was Cheaper Than Paying Off Melania: A leaked excerpt from Michael Cohen’s new tell-all book, claims Donald Trump felt that paying hush-money to adult film star Stormy Daniels would be a helluva lot cheaper than paying off Melania, calling the $130,000 just “pocket change” and adding that his supporters might think it was super "cool” if they found out he slept with a porn star.

Cool indeed! Because, as we all know, porn stars are “extremely picky" about who they have sex with. Sadly though, those Trump supporters can basically forget about that “cool factor.” The truth is, Trump paid Stormy off to keep her mouth shut during the election - not for the sex.

So, the bottom line is, we have a President, beloved by the evangelical Christian crowd - who ranks women by how much it costs to sleep with them. That sure ought to boost his standing with female voters, or at least with the ones who’ve never completed 5th grade.

Anyway, on a positive note - at least Stormy actually got paid for the services she rendered, which is certainly a helluva lot better than most vendors who’ve dealt with Trump have fared. Now, the only question that remains unanswered is, will the IRS allow the President to claim that $130,000 pornstar payoff - as a tax deduction?

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Sen. Katie Britt Blames Biden for a Rape 20 Years Ago in Mexico

During what many are calling an absolutely insane rebuttal to President Biden’s “State of the Union” address, Sen. Katie Boyd Britt (R-Ala.), walked onto a studio sound stage (set up like an upper-middle-class kitchen) and began to link a harrowing account of a young woman’s sex trafficking and rape by a Mexican drug cartel, to Joe Biden’s immigration policies of the 2020s. She did this even though the abuse happened nearly 20 years ago and in Mexico - and at a time when Republican George W. Bush was president, not Joe Biden. The girl about whom Sen. Britt spoke - was thrown out of her house by her mother at age 12 and eventually “fell prey to a professional pimp.” There is no evidence that she was ever held by a drug cartel, as Katie claimed. In addition, the young victim testified that most of her clients for prostitution were foreigners visiting Mexico to have sex with underage girls. Okay, so now let me get this straight. A young Mexican fema...

White House Calls Trump Property the Perfect G7 Meeting Location

White House Calls Trump Property the Perfect G7 Meeting Location: The White House and President Trump are raising eyebrows once again after they selected Donald Trump’s National Doral Resort Hotel as the “perfect location” for the next G7 summit while also suggesting President Trump plans to re-invite Russian President Vladimir Putin to the meeting. Well gee-whiz, what a lucky break for the Trump Resorts. I mean, who knew there was no other place in the entire United States that would be appropriate to hold a G7 summit other than a Trump property? Imagine that! Of course, at the rate Trump has been betraying all our friends and allies, by the time this conference actually rolls around - my guess is it’s likely only gonna be a G2 summit - with just Trump and Putin in attendance! https://www.johnnyrobishcomedy.com

Trump Claims Bahamas are Full of Bad Gang Members

Trump Claims Bahamas are Full of Bad Gang Members: President Trump shocked reporters by telling them that he is hesitant to allow any Bahamians to enter the US after Hurricane Dorian, because the island is full of "bad gang members.” Right, “bad gang members.” That’s as opposed to all the “good gang members” who follow him. You know, like the KKK, the neo-Nazis and all those white-supremacist militia gangs. But come on, if Trump really thought that there’s all these “bad guys” roaming around in the Bahamas, you’d think he’d have invited them to meet with him at Camp David by now. That said, my guess is that about the only thing Donald Trump actually knows about the Bahamas is that it’s surrounded bigly, by a Yuge bunch of water. https://www.johnnyrobishcomedy.com

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