Kushner Told Woodward Trump is the Getting Country Back from the Doctors

Kushner Told Woodward Trump is the Getting Country Back from the Doctors: In his new book, journalist Bob Woodward says White House senior adviser Jared Kushner told him last April that President Trump’s response to the coronavirus pandemic had progressed to the point where the President is now finally "getting the country back from the doctors.”

Oh, I get it now. What Kushner’s basically telling us is, the virus isn’t the problem - the doctors are! Now, I hate to admit it, but Jared really does make a point which could prove quite useful for our nation’s Trump supporters - especially after Trump’s new Supreme Court strikes down that evil Obamacare.

Now, here’s the plan. If you’re in the Trump cult, the next time you go to the doctor, and they try and to give you one of those damn “medical diagnoses,” just tell ‘em they don’t know what the hell they’re talking about - then, go ask your preacher why you’re coughing up blood and having trouble breathing.

Now, I’m not certainly no theologian, but my guess the answer is - God still thinks you’re a sinner. Remember that one time a few years back, when you voted for a Democrat? Well, God hasn’t forgotten! So, yes my friends, Donald Trump has indeed taken the country back from the doctors, and he’s turned it over - to the undertakers.

https://www.johnnyrobishcomedy.com

Comments

GOP Lawmaker Says Trump’s Conduct Crosses Impeachment Threshold

GOP Lawmaker Says Trump’s Conduct Crosses Impeachment Threshold: Rep. Justin Amash (R-Mich.), has become the first Republican congressman to publicly state that, based on the Mueller Report - the President “engaged in impeachable conduct.” Rep. Amash further added that Attorney General Barr “deliberately misrepresented” the Mueller Report’s findings to congress and to the American public. Oh boy! One can only imagine the 3 AM tweet storm that’s gonna emanate from Trump’s porcelain throne over this level of betrayal. I’ll tell you another thing, disloyalty of this magnitude to the Cult of Trump isn’t likely to set well in America’s trailer parks either. But then again, what else is new? After all, Republicans have never viewed reality as being in their best interests. Now, I have no idea how all this is gonna finally go down, but I do know one thing - Justin Amash is definitely not gonna get an invite to Donald Trump's next wedding....

Self-Described Prophet and Pastor Warns Critics They Risk Leprosy

Self-Described Prophet and Pastor Warns Critics They Risk Leprosy: After numerous prophecies of his failed to materialize, resulting in various accusations of lies and fraud, self-described “prophet” and right-wing pastor Hank Kunneman of “One Voice Ministries” warned fellow Christians that they "better be very careful" about criticizing "prophets" like him, because "It's a dangerous place, and some of you might get leprosy.” Wow, leprosy? That’s one helluva threat! Now, while I wasn’t there, my guess is that it all came down something like this - some critic calls out God’s “prophet” Kunneman for his bogus claims, then further challenges him by declaring “You want a piece of me, then come and get it!” Then God gave that critic leprosy - and that “piece of him” just fell right off. Now, on a personal note, I’ve also been a vocal critic of Kunneman’s ministry for a long time now, and I can happily report that I haven’t come down with “leprosy.” Alth...

Nigerian President Denies Dying and Being Replaced by a Clone

Nigerian President Denies Dying and Being Replaced by a Clone: Speaking at a recent conference, Nigeria’s President Muhammadu Buhari denied claims that he had died and been replaced by a Sudanese impostor or a clone, breaking his silence on a rumor that has been circulating on social media for months. Wait a minute, I think I saw that movie - “ Weekend at Muhammadu’s. ” And, if I remember correctly - wasn’t it was a Sudanese actor who played the lead? Who do they think they’re kidding anyway? After all, I wasn’t born yesterday! Now, of course, I’m sitting out here in California - so I have no sure-fire way to confirm or deny all these rumors, but I do know one thing - if you can’t believe Nigerian e-mails and social media posts, what the hell can you believe? https://www.johnnyrobishcomedy.com

You've Got to Be Kidding?

Search This Blog