Marco Rubio Says Dr. Anthony Fauci is a Liar and an Elitist

Marco Rubio Says Dr. Anthony Fauci is a Liar and an Elitist: With the very real possibility of facing a primary challenge from Ivanka Trump in 2020, Florida senator Marco Rubio has now been desperately trying to appeal to Donald Trump’s far-right supporters, with his latest move being an attack on National Institute of Health virologist Dr. Anthony Fauci - implying he is a liar and an elitist.

Gee, could this possibly be the same Marco Rubio, who used his “elite” position to get vaccinated for COVID-19 ahead of most everyone else, despite not being in any known high-risk category? Or, perhaps the same Marco Rubio, who voted against sending poor, financially desperate Americans - a meager stimulus check?

And now, Rubio’s telling everyone that Dr. Fauci is just another fancy pants, elitist snob, who’s trying to scare folks - by making way too much noise about the need for getting vaccinated? Oh, I see his point. I mean, it’s not like we’re in the middle of some deadly pandemic, or something.

So, to counter all that, and to try and get on the good side of those lovely Trump cultists, the good senator is now going around the state, telling Floridians that “we don't need no stinking vaccinations!” But, will they believe him? Well, certainly! It’s Florida - for God’s sake. These folks will believe anything, assuming it’s not “science-based.”

Besides, these good folks don’t have time for all this socialist vaccination, face mask, and social distancing nonsense. They got other things to worry about. Like their pet python, which ended up growing so damn big, it escaped and ate the neighbor’s dog. Hell, better snatch that serpent right up, and set it loose somewhere in the Everglades, before the neighbors suspect anything.

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GOP Lawmaker Says Trump’s Conduct Crosses Impeachment Threshold

GOP Lawmaker Says Trump’s Conduct Crosses Impeachment Threshold: Rep. Justin Amash (R-Mich.), has become the first Republican congressman to publicly state that, based on the Mueller Report - the President “engaged in impeachable conduct.” Rep. Amash further added that Attorney General Barr “deliberately misrepresented” the Mueller Report’s findings to congress and to the American public. Oh boy! One can only imagine the 3 AM tweet storm that’s gonna emanate from Trump’s porcelain throne over this level of betrayal. I’ll tell you another thing, disloyalty of this magnitude to the Cult of Trump isn’t likely to set well in America’s trailer parks either. But then again, what else is new? After all, Republicans have never viewed reality as being in their best interests. Now, I have no idea how all this is gonna finally go down, but I do know one thing - Justin Amash is definitely not gonna get an invite to Donald Trump's next wedding....

Self-Described Prophet and Pastor Warns Critics They Risk Leprosy

Self-Described Prophet and Pastor Warns Critics They Risk Leprosy: After numerous prophecies of his failed to materialize, resulting in various accusations of lies and fraud, self-described “prophet” and right-wing pastor Hank Kunneman of “One Voice Ministries” warned fellow Christians that they "better be very careful" about criticizing "prophets" like him, because "It's a dangerous place, and some of you might get leprosy.” Wow, leprosy? That’s one helluva threat! Now, while I wasn’t there, my guess is that it all came down something like this - some critic calls out God’s “prophet” Kunneman for his bogus claims, then further challenges him by declaring “You want a piece of me, then come and get it!” Then God gave that critic leprosy - and that “piece of him” just fell right off. Now, on a personal note, I’ve also been a vocal critic of Kunneman’s ministry for a long time now, and I can happily report that I haven’t come down with “leprosy.” Alth...

Nigerian President Denies Dying and Being Replaced by a Clone

Nigerian President Denies Dying and Being Replaced by a Clone: Speaking at a recent conference, Nigeria’s President Muhammadu Buhari denied claims that he had died and been replaced by a Sudanese impostor or a clone, breaking his silence on a rumor that has been circulating on social media for months. Wait a minute, I think I saw that movie - “ Weekend at Muhammadu’s. ” And, if I remember correctly - wasn’t it was a Sudanese actor who played the lead? Who do they think they’re kidding anyway? After all, I wasn’t born yesterday! Now, of course, I’m sitting out here in California - so I have no sure-fire way to confirm or deny all these rumors, but I do know one thing - if you can’t believe Nigerian e-mails and social media posts, what the hell can you believe? https://www.johnnyrobishcomedy.com

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