Trump Hires Two New Attorneys After His Entire Legal Team Quits

Trump Hires Two New Attorneys After His Entire Legal Team Quits: After former President Donald Trump and his entire legal team abruptly parted ways a little over a week before his February 9th trial, due to his insistence on arguing the 2020 election was stolen from him, Donald Trump announced that attorneys David Schoen and Bruce Castor will now head up his legal team for his second impeachment trial.

Wow, first he tells aides not to pay Rudy’s legal fees, and now his entire impeachment legal team quits on him? Hell, if he keeps this nonsense up, about the only legal representation he’ll be able to find - will be LegalZoom.

Of course, Trump being Trump, he naturally thinks he’s “twice as smart as anyone else,” so if he is forced to testify, expect him to try to “take the tenth” - not the “fifth.” After all, “taking a fifth,” sounds more like something alcoholics would do, not big-shot billionaires.

One thing’s for sure, you can bet Trump’s impeachment trial is gonna be pure chaos, Why, this s**t show ought to make “Animal House” look like a Bible study class. Which, could be a good defense strategy - that is, if Trump weren’t too stupid, to actually follow a strategy.

That said, I can’t believe he’s still insisting on using that old “the election was stolen” defense again. I mean, there’ve been over 60 court rulings against him on the matter. Why, the guy has to be completely insane. Which kind of makes me wonder, if all other legal avenues fail - are psychopaths allowed to plead insanity?

Johnny Robish Comedy

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Donald Trump Sporting Slick New Hairdo for UK Visit

Donald Trump Sporting Slick New Hairdo for UK Visit: US President Donald Trump is showing off a shockingly new slicked-back hairdo, as he prepares to meet with the Queen during his first official state visit to the UK. Good God? What the hell is that all about? Is he trying to bring back the mullet? Either that, or he’s secretly planning on entering a Gary Busey lookalike contest as soon as he gets to London. My guess is, he’s trying to put on his best bohunk sexy look for his meetup with the queen. One thing’s for sure, he now actually looks exactly like the greasy, mob slime ball he tries to act like. Maybe he figures that if he ever does get impeached, when they come to get him, no one will be able to recognize him. But hell, even if he does get impeached, he’ll have nothing to worry as far as getting a job. I mean, what respectable La Vegas used car lot wouldn’t wanna hire a guy who looks like that? https://ww...

Self-Described Prophet and Pastor Warns Critics They Risk Leprosy

Self-Described Prophet and Pastor Warns Critics They Risk Leprosy: After numerous prophecies of his failed to materialize, resulting in various accusations of lies and fraud, self-described “prophet” and right-wing pastor Hank Kunneman of “One Voice Ministries” warned fellow Christians that they "better be very careful" about criticizing "prophets" like him, because "It's a dangerous place, and some of you might get leprosy.” Wow, leprosy? That’s one helluva threat! Now, while I wasn’t there, my guess is that it all came down something like this - some critic calls out God’s “prophet” Kunneman for his bogus claims, then further challenges him by declaring “You want a piece of me, then come and get it!” Then God gave that critic leprosy - and that “piece of him” just fell right off. Now, on a personal note, I’ve also been a vocal critic of Kunneman’s ministry for a long time now, and I can happily report that I haven’t come down with “leprosy.” Alth...

Trump Tells Hannity He Can Declassify Secret Documents With Just His Mind

During a recent interview on Fox News with Sean Hannity, former president Donald Trump tried to defend stashing extremely sensitive classified documents at his Mar-a-Lago resort by saying he was the president, and the president can declassify, simply by “saying its declassified.” Trump further added that “there doesn't have to be a process - there can be a process, but there doesn't have to be.” Trump then told Hannity that if you're the president of the United States, you can actually declassify something “by just ‘ thinking’ about it.” Oh, my word! You mean to tell me Trump actually thinks he can declassify the government's most guarded secrets, simply by “thinking about them?” Now, not to be critical, but it sure sounds like someone has been spending way too much of their spare time binge-watching old episodes of “I Dream of Jeannie.” I mean, about the only thing he left out was that he also sprinkled the documents with “pixie dust!” This...

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