Texas Republicans Beg Biden for Help Weeks After Endorsing Secession Bill

Texas Republicans Beg Biden for Help Weeks After Endorsing Secession Bill: In response to a huge winter storm that hit Texas this past weekend, causing traffic accidents and power outages, Texas Governor Greg Abbott and Republican lawmakers immediately ran to the Biden Administration, begging for “federal aid.” This, just weeks after those very same Texas Republicans endorsed “The Texas Session Bill,” declaring that they no longer wish to be part of the United States.

Wow, a massive snowstorm hit Texas? Is it just me, or has hell - actually frozen over? And gee whiz, I thought all red states are supposed to HATE federal “handouts.” I guess that only applies when that federal aid has been designated to help people in blue states. Anyone remember Hurricane Sandy? Thus proving, once again, that everything is indeed bigger in Texas - especially hypocrisy!

Of course, I get where they’re coming from. After all, about the last thing any self-respecting Texan needs, is a bunch of ice sickles hanging down off their fancy cowboy hats and belt buckles! Why that just kills the whole look. And, to his credit, President Biden immediately granted the Texas request for relief.

On the other hand, considering their bill to secede from the Union, someone not quite as polite as Joe Biden might have told those Texas Republicans - “gee, while we'd love to help you guys, Donald Trump left everything in such a helluva mess, we really need to take care of folks here in the US - before we can consider granting any foreign aid.”

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GOP Lawmaker Says Trump’s Conduct Crosses Impeachment Threshold

GOP Lawmaker Says Trump’s Conduct Crosses Impeachment Threshold: Rep. Justin Amash (R-Mich.), has become the first Republican congressman to publicly state that, based on the Mueller Report - the President “engaged in impeachable conduct.” Rep. Amash further added that Attorney General Barr “deliberately misrepresented” the Mueller Report’s findings to congress and to the American public. Oh boy! One can only imagine the 3 AM tweet storm that’s gonna emanate from Trump’s porcelain throne over this level of betrayal. I’ll tell you another thing, disloyalty of this magnitude to the Cult of Trump isn’t likely to set well in America’s trailer parks either. But then again, what else is new? After all, Republicans have never viewed reality as being in their best interests. Now, I have no idea how all this is gonna finally go down, but I do know one thing - Justin Amash is definitely not gonna get an invite to Donald Trump's next wedding....

Self-Described Prophet and Pastor Warns Critics They Risk Leprosy

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Nigerian President Denies Dying and Being Replaced by a Clone

Nigerian President Denies Dying and Being Replaced by a Clone: Speaking at a recent conference, Nigeria’s President Muhammadu Buhari denied claims that he had died and been replaced by a Sudanese impostor or a clone, breaking his silence on a rumor that has been circulating on social media for months. Wait a minute, I think I saw that movie - “ Weekend at Muhammadu’s. ” And, if I remember correctly - wasn’t it was a Sudanese actor who played the lead? Who do they think they’re kidding anyway? After all, I wasn’t born yesterday! Now, of course, I’m sitting out here in California - so I have no sure-fire way to confirm or deny all these rumors, but I do know one thing - if you can’t believe Nigerian e-mails and social media posts, what the hell can you believe? https://www.johnnyrobishcomedy.com

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