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MAGA Pastor Rick Joyner Now Promoting Civil War to His Followers


MAGA Pastor Rick Joyner Now Promoting Civil War to His Followers:  MAGA evangelical pastor Rick Joyner has been busy hard-selling civil war these days, telling followers that the Lord came to him in a dream, showing him armed militia groups popping up like mushrooms all over the country and Jesus proclaiming “I didn’t come to bring peace, I came to bring a sword.”  Joyner then added that “this is no time to be praying for unity and for parties to come together,” it’s time to “stand up and push back against this evil that has been taking over our land.”

Oh, my God!  You mean to tell me that that could have been Jesus right there at the US Capitol insurrection on Jan 6th, turning bottled water into AR-15s?  Telling all the Proud Boys, QAnons, Oathkeepers, and Three Percenters - “don’t worry about a thing guys, me and Donald Trump got ya covered.”  Why the Lord does work in mysterious ways.


Now, what I’d like to know is, exactly what was the Lord wearing when he delivered the message to Pastor Joyner in that dream?  It wasn’t, by any chance, a nicely-tailored seersucker suit was it, because Amazon’s had them on sale for several weeks now.  Is it possible the Lord uses Amazon Prime like the rest of us?


But all that aside, I find it kinda funny how religious hucksters like Joyner are about the only folks who can hear voices in their heads these days, and still be taken seriously.  I mean, insane asylums are just filled to the brim with folks who claim “the Lord came to them in a dream,” yet folks like Joyner make a small fortune out of it.


Now, I’m certainly in no position to advise “God” on how to run His universe - but frankly, if I were running the cosmos and came to Pastor Joyner in a dream, rather than advise him to heavily arm everyone and prepare for civil war, I’d simply remind Pastor Joyner that “perhaps it’s time to go back on your meds.”


Johnny Robish Comedy

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