QAnon Now Focusing on Attacking Coronavirus Vaccine

QAnon Now Focusing on Attacking Coronavirus Vaccine: With Donald Trump now pretty much out of the picture, QAnon groups realized that they are in desperate need of a new “boogieman,” and have moved their focus away from the past election and are now targeting coronavirus vaccines - depicting them as “bioweapons,” concocted by an evil cabal of Bill Gates, corrupt government officials, Hollywood celebrates and pharmaceutical companies. All this, with the diabolical goal of “depopulation, social control and altering the genetic DNA structure of our species.”

Now, some of you may ask, how could anyone possibly believe that Bill Gates could manage to put a tiny, little microchip into every single dose of the coronavirus vaccine? Well, laugh if you want, but all I know is - since getting vaccinated, I’m now showing one helluva lot more bars on my cellphone.

In fact, shortly after receiving the vaccine, I could feel that “Bill Gates chip” slowly migrating up my arm until it lodged itself somewhere deep within my brain. I hope you’ll all forgive me, but I can’t help but wish that all those DNA changes this vaccine is supposed to make, will somehow turn out to be an improvement over what I’m currently stuck with.

And, just in case you’re wondering if this “Bill Gates chip” even works, then please explain my sudden concern with issues like “global warming” and “expanding educational opportunities in 3rd world countries.” So much so, that the following day - I found myself making investments in Tesla, Curiosity Stream, and of course Microsoft.

Not long after that, I began to realize just how much celebrities like Dolly Parton are involved, as I found myself frequently humming odd lyrics to one of her famous old songs “Vaccine, vaccine, vaccine, vacceeeene!” Now, do you understand how insidious this vaccine threat really is?

Anyway, at this point in time and space, let’s hope all this blows over really quick, so that we as a nation can move on to addressing some even more serious issues, such as “just why the hell is the government banning Dr. Seuss and emasculating Mr. Potato Head?

Johnny Robish Comedy

Comments

Donald Trump Sporting Slick New Hairdo for UK Visit

Donald Trump Sporting Slick New Hairdo for UK Visit: US President Donald Trump is showing off a shockingly new slicked-back hairdo, as he prepares to meet with the Queen during his first official state visit to the UK. Good God? What the hell is that all about? Is he trying to bring back the mullet? Either that, or he’s secretly planning on entering a Gary Busey lookalike contest as soon as he gets to London. My guess is, he’s trying to put on his best bohunk sexy look for his meetup with the queen. One thing’s for sure, he now actually looks exactly like the greasy, mob slime ball he tries to act like. Maybe he figures that if he ever does get impeached, when they come to get him, no one will be able to recognize him. But hell, even if he does get impeached, he’ll have nothing to worry as far as getting a job. I mean, what respectable La Vegas used car lot wouldn’t wanna hire a guy who looks like that? https://ww...

Trump Tells Hannity He Can Declassify Secret Documents With Just His Mind

During a recent interview on Fox News with Sean Hannity, former president Donald Trump tried to defend stashing extremely sensitive classified documents at his Mar-a-Lago resort by saying he was the president, and the president can declassify, simply by “saying its declassified.” Trump further added that “there doesn't have to be a process - there can be a process, but there doesn't have to be.” Trump then told Hannity that if you're the president of the United States, you can actually declassify something “by just ‘ thinking’ about it.” Oh, my word! You mean to tell me Trump actually thinks he can declassify the government's most guarded secrets, simply by “thinking about them?” Now, not to be critical, but it sure sounds like someone has been spending way too much of their spare time binge-watching old episodes of “I Dream of Jeannie.” I mean, about the only thing he left out was that he also sprinkled the documents with “pixie dust!” This...

Trump Takes to Truth Social to Spread ‘Roomer’ About Ron DeSantis

Former president Donald Trump just shared some juicy gossip about Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis on his Truth Social platform. Trump posted, “Roomer (sic) are (sic) strong in political circles that Ron DeSanctimonious, whose Presidential run is a shambles, and whose poll numbers have absolutely crashed, putting him 3rd and 4th in some states, will be dropping out of the Presidential race in order to run, in Florida, against Rick Scott for Senate. Now that’s an interesting one, isn’t it?” Gee, Donald Trump spreading “roomers?” Say it ain’t so! Now, me thinks perhaps that prestigious Wharton School of Business Trump attended might want to consider adding some basic 3rd-grade spelling classes to its curriculum. Apparently, Trump is stalled at that level of language development where he is still spelling words phonetically. Why his poor spelling makes him look like a real “looser.” Frankly, I’m not sure its a wise choice for Republicans to choose ...

You've Got to Be Kidding?

Search This Blog