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Trump Calls Kentucky Derby Winning Horse Medina Spirit a Junkie


Trump Calls Kentucky Derby Winning Horse Medina Spirit a Junkie: 
After it was announced that Kentucky Derby winner Medina Spirit failed a drug test after the race, former President Donald Trump took to his new blog and immediately fired off a statement labeling the horse a “junky.”  Mr. Trump then claimed that incidents like this are emblematic of the decline happening to our country and the primary reason behind his 2020 election loss.

Wow, sounds like Mr. Trump must have bet on the wrong horse and lost himself a little chunk of change.  Now, is it just me, or does Trump seem to be “looking for junkies in all the wrong places?”  I mean, only a guy like Donald Trump could completely ignore the horse’s “white trainer,” and then try and blame everything on a “black horse.”  Now, we all know Medina Spirit is one helluva fast runner, but apparently - his real talent is his ability to shoot up drugs, using only his hooves.


But, all of that aside - NO, Mr. Trump!  This incident is not emblematic of any decline that’s happening in our country.  What it’s really emblematic of, is what is happening in the Republican Party - it’s called “cheating, in order to win at all costs.”  Which frankly, is perfectly fine with most Republicans, who came for the tax cuts, but stayed for the racism.


Well, one thing’s for sure - the way “junky” was spelled tells us that this post was actually written by Donald Trump himself.  After all, everyone knows Donald Trump has all the best “spellings” for all the best words.  Now, just for your edification Mr. Trump, when something is “junky,” that means it’s trashy, cheap, or tacky - kind like you.  On the other hand, a “junkie” is someone hopelessly addicted to illegal drugs - you know, like Don Jr.


Speaking of which, wasn’t there once a movie back in the day called “They Shoot Up Horses Don't They?”  Anyway, if Mr. Trump is sincerely concerned that poor Medina Spirit may be a junkie, perhaps the former President might consider visiting the horse at his stall and offer the animal some of that good horse sense of his.  After all, we all know that Donald Trump is well known as a “stable” genius.


Johnny Robish Comedy

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