Jeff Bezos and Brother to Be Aboard First Blue Origin Spaceflight

Jeff Bezos and Brother to Be Aboard First Blue Origin Spaceflight: CNN reports that Jeff Bezos, his brother, along with the winner of a month-long auction, will be flying into space on the first crewed flight of the “New Shepard,” the rocket ship made by his space company Blue Origin. The flight is scheduled for July 20th, just 15 days after he is set to step down as CEO of Amazon.

Wow! Now, that’s got to be just about the best “mid-life crisis bucket list adventure” ever! I hope he’s not depending on Alexa for directions. I guess it was either head up to space, or take the damn yacht down to Barbados yet another time. And, to show what a regular guy he is - Bezos says he’ll be flying coach on this flight. That said, I’d be more than happy to hold onto his wallet until he gets back - should he need someone for the job.

Of course, the truth be known, Bezos’ Blue Origin doesn’t really go high enough or fast enough to actually orbit in space. It just kind of blasts itself up, and then quickly falls down - sort of like a “glorified roller coaster.” Therefore, to be completely accurate, I suppose Bezos and his fellow passengers, should be really be classified as “astro-nots.”

Anyway, it appears crewed space flight is slowly becoming just a very expensive carnival ride for the extremely wealthy. Too bad too, because I was kind of hoping they’d take Joe Manchin and Kyrsten Sinema along with them. Wonder if, like most amusement park rides, they’ll have a sign posted next to the rocket’s entrance that states “You must be at least 5’ tall to go on this ride.”

Well, one thing’s for sure, you can bet all the employees at all those Amazon fulfillment centers across the country will be in their “break lounges,” eagerly watching their CEO’s space journey on the TV. Oh, wait - silly me! I totally forgot - Amazon doesn’t believe in giving their employees breaks.

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GOP Lawmaker Says Trump’s Conduct Crosses Impeachment Threshold

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Nigerian President Denies Dying and Being Replaced by a Clone

Nigerian President Denies Dying and Being Replaced by a Clone: Speaking at a recent conference, Nigeria’s President Muhammadu Buhari denied claims that he had died and been replaced by a Sudanese impostor or a clone, breaking his silence on a rumor that has been circulating on social media for months. Wait a minute, I think I saw that movie - “ Weekend at Muhammadu’s. ” And, if I remember correctly - wasn’t it was a Sudanese actor who played the lead? Who do they think they’re kidding anyway? After all, I wasn’t born yesterday! Now, of course, I’m sitting out here in California - so I have no sure-fire way to confirm or deny all these rumors, but I do know one thing - if you can’t believe Nigerian e-mails and social media posts, what the hell can you believe? https://www.johnnyrobishcomedy.com

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