Trump Livid as Arizona GOP ‘Audit’ Renders Even Bigger Win for Biden

Even after the $6 million Republican-led Arizona state Senate "forensic audit" determined he was soundly beaten by Joe Biden, and by even more votes than originally counted, Donald Trump continues to tell his supporters that “the audit has uncovered significant and undeniable evidence of FRAUD!” In addition, he’s calling news outlets reporting his latest defeat as “more fake news,” and repeating his old claim that the 2020 election was “stolen from him.”

Gee whiz, this sure smells of desperate denial! My, my, reminds me of how much “I love the smell of desperation in the morning!” Now, some of you may argue that Trump and his supporters “simply can’t really handle the truth.” Well, the truth is, Trump has not only “handled” the truth, he frequently molests it!

So, even after the “audit” proved Trump lost, he continues to tell his base it’s all “fake news” and that “the election was stolen.” Really? Because as far and I can tell, it appears about the only thing that was actually stolen, was last the four years of our lives, when Trump was busy impersonating a President of the United States.

Anyway, now that this costly $6 million “audit” is over, hopefully, Republicans can now start to focus on things that really matter to their constituencies - you know, like “finding Obama’s birth certificate.” Frankly, it’s really beginning to feel like we’re having a full-fledged, mental health crisis here in this country - more commonly known as “the Republican Party.”

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Donald Trump Sporting Slick New Hairdo for UK Visit

Donald Trump Sporting Slick New Hairdo for UK Visit: US President Donald Trump is showing off a shockingly new slicked-back hairdo, as he prepares to meet with the Queen during his first official state visit to the UK. Good God? What the hell is that all about? Is he trying to bring back the mullet? Either that, or he’s secretly planning on entering a Gary Busey lookalike contest as soon as he gets to London. My guess is, he’s trying to put on his best bohunk sexy look for his meetup with the queen. One thing’s for sure, he now actually looks exactly like the greasy, mob slime ball he tries to act like. Maybe he figures that if he ever does get impeached, when they come to get him, no one will be able to recognize him. But hell, even if he does get impeached, he’ll have nothing to worry as far as getting a job. I mean, what respectable La Vegas used car lot wouldn’t wanna hire a guy who looks like that? https://ww...

Self-Described Prophet and Pastor Warns Critics They Risk Leprosy

Self-Described Prophet and Pastor Warns Critics They Risk Leprosy: After numerous prophecies of his failed to materialize, resulting in various accusations of lies and fraud, self-described “prophet” and right-wing pastor Hank Kunneman of “One Voice Ministries” warned fellow Christians that they "better be very careful" about criticizing "prophets" like him, because "It's a dangerous place, and some of you might get leprosy.” Wow, leprosy? That’s one helluva threat! Now, while I wasn’t there, my guess is that it all came down something like this - some critic calls out God’s “prophet” Kunneman for his bogus claims, then further challenges him by declaring “You want a piece of me, then come and get it!” Then God gave that critic leprosy - and that “piece of him” just fell right off. Now, on a personal note, I’ve also been a vocal critic of Kunneman’s ministry for a long time now, and I can happily report that I haven’t come down with “leprosy.” Alth...

Trump Tells Hannity He Can Declassify Secret Documents With Just His Mind

During a recent interview on Fox News with Sean Hannity, former president Donald Trump tried to defend stashing extremely sensitive classified documents at his Mar-a-Lago resort by saying he was the president, and the president can declassify, simply by “saying its declassified.” Trump further added that “there doesn't have to be a process - there can be a process, but there doesn't have to be.” Trump then told Hannity that if you're the president of the United States, you can actually declassify something “by just ‘ thinking’ about it.” Oh, my word! You mean to tell me Trump actually thinks he can declassify the government's most guarded secrets, simply by “thinking about them?” Now, not to be critical, but it sure sounds like someone has been spending way too much of their spare time binge-watching old episodes of “I Dream of Jeannie.” I mean, about the only thing he left out was that he also sprinkled the documents with “pixie dust!” This...

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