Skip to main content

Trump Holds Press Conference to Claim He Alone Can Quickly End Ukrainian Crisis


During a news conference before his speech at the Conservative Political Action Conference (CPAC), former President Donald Trump was asked, "If you were president right now, and the situation is what it is right now, what should Joe Biden do?”  Trump responded by saying "Well I think I know exactly what should be done," but then refused to say what that was, other than claiming “I think it would end it pretty quickly."


Wow!  “Attention shoppers!  We have a huge word salad spill, over on aisle four.”  Gee whiz, it sounds like Mr. Trump is back on his game -  a totally psychotic game, but a game all the same.  Of course, we already know what his plan is.  No need for him to say it out loud.  There is even a name for his plan, it’s called “No Fucking Idea.”   


I mean, come on!  At least Marjorie Taylor Greene can articulate her plan.  “First, zap them with a ‘Jewish Space Laser’ - then, send in the ‘Gazpacho,’ to clean up whatever resistance might still remain.”  Not surprisingly, Trump’s back to using his old line about “I alone can do this!”  The trouble is, he doesn’t really mention on whose behalf - Russia’s or Ukraine’s?  


Why, during his press conference, he even alluded to the use of nuclear weapons - not once, but several times.  Hell, Trump thinks nukes can solve practically everything.  Remember back a few years ago, when he actually wanted to “nuke a hurricane?”  Good times!  Now, is it just me, or does anyone else have a hard time figuring out how so many of our friends and neighbors, can say they actually “miss” those days?


So, what’s the solution to this mounting international crisis?  Well, listen to any card-carrying QAnon member as many of today’s crop of Republicans do, and they will be the first to tell you “not to worry, everything will be revealed - once JFK Jr. makes his official reappearance back in Dallas later this year.”  So, at least we’ve all got that going for us!


If you’ve enjoyed what you’ve just read, please consider joining me at:

Johnny Robish Comedy

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Sen. Katie Britt Blames Biden for a Rape 20 Years Ago in Mexico

During what many are calling an absolutely insane rebuttal to President Biden’s “State of the Union” address, Sen. Katie Boyd Britt (R-Ala.), walked onto a studio sound stage (set up like an upper-middle-class kitchen) and began to link a harrowing account of a young woman’s sex trafficking and rape by a Mexican drug cartel, to Joe Biden’s immigration policies of the 2020s.  She did this even though the abuse happened nearly 20 years ago and in Mexico - and at a time when Republican George W. Bush was president, not Joe Biden.  The girl about whom Sen. Britt spoke - was thrown out of her house by her mother at age 12 and eventually “fell prey to a professional pimp.”  There is no evidence that she was ever held by a drug cartel, as Katie claimed.  In addition, the young victim testified that most of her clients for prostitution were foreigners visiting Mexico to have sex with underage girls.   Okay, so now let me get this straight.  A young Mexican fema...

White House Calls Trump Property the Perfect G7 Meeting Location

White House Calls Trump Property the Perfect G7 Meeting Location:   The White House and President Trump are raising eyebrows once again after they selected Donald Trump’s National Doral Resort Hotel as the “perfect location” for the next G7 summit while also suggesting President Trump plans to re-invite Russian President Vladimir Putin to the meeting.  Well gee-whiz, what a lucky break for the Trump Resorts.  I mean, who knew there was no other place in the entire United States that would be appropriate to hold a G7 summit other than a Trump property?  Imagine that! Of course, at the rate Trump has been betraying all our friends and allies, by the time this conference actually rolls around - my guess is it’s likely only gonna be a G2 summit - with just Trump and Putin in attendance! https://www.johnnyrobishcomedy.com

Gallup Finds Only 45% Of Republicans Believe In Science

As deadly new variants of the coronavirus are spreading rapidly around the globe, a disturbing new Gallup poll found American confidence in science has split heavily along party lines, with 79 percent of Democrats expressing confidence in science, while only 45 percent of Republicans say they believe in science.   Really?  Oh, for the love of Trump!  And, from the looks of things, it also appears a lot of these same Trump Republicans don’t have much “confidence” in dental hygiene either.  Don’t laugh, good folks like these have kept denture makes and dental implant centers in business for years.  Why, what’s more American than a water glass with dentures soaking in it, resting on a night stand next to your bed? Besides, with the good folks like Tucker Carlson, Lauren Boebert (R-CO), Marjorie Taylor Greene (R-GA), and Madison Cawthorn (R-NC) - keeping “patriots” informed about all the evils and dangers of COVID vaccines, who needs science?  After a...