Skip to main content

Dr. Oz Campaign Blames His Opponent's Stroke on Poor Diet


The Dr. Oz Campaign has been on the receiving end of tons of mockery over a campaign video in which the doctor blamed the high price of “crudités” on Joe Biden, and then managed to mangle the names of the two grocery stores he visited in the video.  In response to the crudités mockery, the Oz Campaign issued a statement claiming that John Fetterman, Dr. Oz’s Democratic opponent for US Senate in Pennsylvania, might not have even had his stroke if he “had ever eaten a vegetable in his life.”

OK, got it, doctor!  Sound nutritional advice from a snake-oil TV doctor who brags about being endorsed by Donald Trump, an orange specimen who basically lives on nothing but McDonald’s cheeseburgers, fries, and diet Cokes.  Now, not to sound critical, but perhaps Dr. Oz might concern himself a little more with what flows out of his mouth, rather than what goes into John Fetterman’s mouth.


Of course, we all know that’s not very likely.  Campaign ads like Dr. Oz’s grocery store fiasco, demonstrate how much wealthy Republican politicians love cosplaying as “just regular working-class folk.”  That said, it’s funny how quickly things can change!  Why, it seems like just yesterday, when Republicans implied Michelle Obama was Satan incarnate - for simply suggesting similar dietary choices be made available in public schools.


Naturally, Oz made his diagnosis without ever examining Fetterman.  Now, what confuses me is how a doctor in New Jersey can tell if an individual who is in Pennsylvania, hasn’t been consuming enough “crudités?”  Oddly, Dr. Oz is not only a TV personality and politician, but also a “cardiac surgeon.”  That’s right, “a heart surgeon,” which makes no sense, because if we’ve learned anything during these Trump years - its that Republicans don’t even have hearts.


If you’ve enjoyed what you’ve just read, please consider joining me at:

Johnny Robish Comedy

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Marjorie Taylor Greene Claims Pete Buttigieg Emasculating Driving With Electric Cars

During a segment on Neil Cavuto’s Fox News program, US Transportation Secretary Pete Buttigieg was told by the host that Marjorie Taylor Greene is claiming "Mr. Buttigieg is trying to emasculate the way we drive" by supporting electric vehicles.  In response, Buttigieg told Cavuto that “my sense of manhood is not connected to whether my vehicle is fueled by gasoline, or whether it's fueled by electricity.”  When asked by Cavuto if he was offended by what Greene said, Buttigieg remarked "To be honest, there are other members of Congress that I pay more attention to when I'm thinking about opinions that really matter.” Oh, come on now!  Let’s get real.  It would take a helluva lot more than an electric car to “emasculate” Marjorie Taylor Greene.  Besides, I’m pretty sure “real men” actually ride horses, anyway.  Of course, I’m certainly no psychiatrist, but it sounds like Greene’s anger could be a combination of both “road rage” and “roid rage,” leaving her...

Mike Huckabee Claims COVID-19 Death Risk Small and Sin Risk Lethal

Mike Huckabee Claims COVID-19 Death Risk Small and Sin Risk Lethal:   Former Republican presidential candidate Mike Huckabee has stirred some controversy with medical professionals by claiming that the risk of death from coronavirus is very “minimal,” but “sin is 100% lethal. Oh, really Mike?  Then how about showing me a death certificate which lists “sin” as the primary cause of death.  Of course, the fact is, sin couldn’t be 100% lethal, or a guy like me wouldn’t even be alive to write this.   On the other hand, maybe you’re on to something Mike - and sin really is lethal, and I secretly used a “ghostwriter” to write this joke. https://www.johnnyrobishcomedy.com

Trump Takes to Truth Social to Spread ‘Roomer’ About Ron DeSantis

Former president Donald Trump just shared some juicy gossip about Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis on his Truth Social platform.   Trump posted, “Roomer (sic) are (sic) strong in political circles that Ron DeSanctimonious, whose Presidential run is a shambles, and whose poll numbers have absolutely crashed, putting him 3rd and 4th in some states, will be dropping out of the Presidential race in order to run, in Florida, against Rick Scott for Senate.   Now that’s an interesting one, isn’t it?” Gee, Donald Trump spreading “roomers?”  Say it ain’t so!   Now, me thinks perhaps that prestigious Wharton School of Business Trump attended might want to consider adding some basic 3rd-grade spelling classes to its curriculum.   Apparently, Trump is stalled at that level of language development where he is still spelling words phonetically.   Why his poor spelling makes him look like a real “looser.”   Frankly, I’m not sure its a wise choice for Republicans to choose ...