Skip to main content

North Carolina Republicans Introduce Bill to Outlaw “Participation Trophies”


Republicans in North Carolina are moving to outlaw “Participation Trophies,” with State Sen. Timothy Moffitt introducing the "Eliminate Participation Trophies Act" (SB 430).  The bill reads, "Youth sports or other youth recreation activities operated under the authority of a local government shall not include awards for participants based solely on their participation in the sport or other activity," the proposed law states. "Awards provided in connection with the activity, if any, shall be based on identified performance achievements.”

Terrific move, Repubs!  Yet another instance of the Republican party being laser-focused on the issues that really make a difference in people’s lives.  Wow, is this seriously the most pressing issue in North Carolina for elected officials to address?  Come on, why this?  Are there no little puppies to kick or no tiny kittens to drown?  I guess we don’t even need to ask what they really think about organizations like the “Special Olympics.”  That said, I get where they’re coming from on all this.  After all, they don’t want voters to start taking them seriously and expect them to legislate something of real value to citizens.

My guess is North Carolina might be angling for that coveted “Worst Carolina” trophy?  I mean, if they’re so opposed to “Participation Trophies,” then just what the hell do they think all their “Confederate monuments” are anyway?  Are we to assume this means no more Confederate flags can fly in the state?  After all, we only celebrate the “winners,” not the damn “losers.”  Of course, having no Confederate flags will sure take all the fun out of their Monster Truck events.  Oh well, I guess they’ll always have their "I Participated in the Jan 6th Insurrection" T-shirts to give them street cred.

Now let me get this straight, kids are getting shot in classrooms all the time, yet Republicans wanna save them from “Participation Trophies?”  OK, but what I don’t understand is just how Republicans intend to enforce this law?  I mean, will they have “monitors” in school classrooms and gymnasiums ready to confiscate "awards" if its decided the child really hasn’t done enough to deserve it?  Will armed SWAT teams forcibly burst into students’ homes and bedrooms and yank these trophies off these kids’ desks and dressers?  Only your “small government” Republican legislators know for sure, folks

If you’ve enjoyed what you’ve just read, please consider joining me at:

Johnny Robish Comedy

Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Trump Using Divisive Topics Like Plastic Straws to Energize Base

Trump Using Divisive Topics Like Plastic Straws to Energize Base:  Using tactics such as plastic straws, wind turbines, bogus conspiracy theories and race-baiting, White House aides freely admit that Donald Trump has been deliberately attempting to amplify public tensions in America by seizing on divisive issues as a means to energize his explosively angry base. Now, I know what some of you are thinking - you’re thinking “now this, is the last straw!”  Well, before you attack the “straw man,” remember that Donald Trump was that kid in school who thought it was simply hilarious to jam two straws up his nostrils.  Straws were an important part of Donald’s childhood, so it shouldn’t be a big surprise they remain so today.     What all you “elites" don’t understand is that Trump folks are all about fighting for “freedom.”  You know, the freedom to be morbidly obese, the freedom to destroy the environment, the freedom to live without affordable healt...
Post a Comment
Read more

Green-Haired Turtle that Breathes Through Genitals Added to Endangered List

Green-Haired Turtle that Breathes Through Genitals Added to Endangered List:  The Mary River turtle of Queensland, Australia, which breaths through its genitals and sports a punky green Mohican hairdo, has been placed on a new list of the most vulnerable reptile species on the planet.  Now, of course, we’ve all known people who talk out of their ass, but come on - breathing through your genitals is quite a feat.  http://www.johnnyrobish.com Study Finds Flat Earth Believers Tend to Be Young:  A new survey found that 34 percent of 18- to 24-year-olds entertain some doubts about whether the Earth is actually round.  Good grief, sounds like we flat out need to see that these millennials get a more well-rounded education.  http://www.johnnyrobish.com Huge-Nosed Dinosaur Found in Utah:  Paleontologists have discovered a new dinosaur which had a humongous nose that lived 76-million years ago in what is now Utah.  Ironically, if ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Trump Commutes Old Pal Roger Stone's Sentence

Trump Commutes Old Pal Roger Stone's Sentence:   After declaring Roger Stone a victim of the “Russia hoax” perpetuated by the Left and its allies in the media, President Trump has commuted the three-year prison criminal sentence for the Republican operative and dirty trickster, who was due to report to federal prison on Tuesday after being found guilty of obstruction, witness tampering and lying to Congress. Good grief, is it my imagination, or has Trump actually just pardoned the real-life version of the Monopoly guy?  I mean, Stone is a villain right out of Charles Dickens.  Why, this is an act so corrupt, it’s almost enough to make Kim Jong-un and Vladimir Putin blush. Now, I’m no legal expert, but it appears what the Trump Administration is basically arguing is that - someone shouldn’t be punished for committing a crime which “they really should’ve gotten away with.”  And while that may sound a bit odd to the rest of us, that kind of thinking makes go...
Post a Comment
Read more