Trader Joe’s Forced to Issue Recall After Rocks Found in Cookies

NBC News reports that Trader Joe's has recalled two flavors of its cookies because the snacks may contain rocks. The grocery chain was advised by the supplier who makes the cookies that their Trader Joe's Almond Windmill Cookies and its Dark Chocolate Chunk and Almond Cookies have a “rock problem," and the remaining supplies on the shelves and in the warehouses have been destroyed. The supplier did not explain how rocks got into the cookies.

Well, no doubt a lot of folks are now gonna be really pissed at Trader Joe’s for selling cookies with rocks in them. Granite, finding rocks in your cookies is a problem, but as they say, “This too shall pass.” Besides, “Let ye who has the perfect cookie cast the first stone.” Now, the way I figure it, about the only ones who really need to be concerned about folks eating cookies with rocks in them - would be people who live in glass houses, but who am I to judge?

Sadly, this isn’t the first time Trader Joe’s has been in hot water over issues like this. Earlier this year, it was disclosed that their “Marble Cake” was actually made with REAL marbles. Makes you wonder just who the hell was the intended market for these cookies with rocks in them, anyway? The Flintstones? That said, pot smokers will tell you, “Sure, these cookies may have a few rocks in them, but they still taste spectacular when you're ‘stoned.’ Dude, these cookies really ROCK!” Perhaps, but I think even for a stoner, finding rocks in your cookies would be news that would be “a little hard to swallow.”

If you’ve enjoyed what you’ve just read, please consider joining me at:

Johnny Robish Comedy

Comments

Trump Takes to Truth Social to Spread ‘Roomer’ About Ron DeSantis

Former president Donald Trump just shared some juicy gossip about Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis on his Truth Social platform. Trump posted, “Roomer (sic) are (sic) strong in political circles that Ron DeSanctimonious, whose Presidential run is a shambles, and whose poll numbers have absolutely crashed, putting him 3rd and 4th in some states, will be dropping out of the Presidential race in order to run, in Florida, against Rick Scott for Senate. Now that’s an interesting one, isn’t it?” Gee, Donald Trump spreading “roomers?” Say it ain’t so! Now, me thinks perhaps that prestigious Wharton School of Business Trump attended might want to consider adding some basic 3rd-grade spelling classes to its curriculum. Apparently, Trump is stalled at that level of language development where he is still spelling words phonetically. Why his poor spelling makes him look like a real “looser.” Frankly, I’m not sure its a wise choice for Republicans to choose ...

Anti-Vax Newsmax Host Says Diseases are Supposed to Kill People

Conservative network Newsmax has been forced to “distance itself” from remarks uttered by host Rob Schmitt this week, who claimed that vaccines go "against nature" because diseases are "supposed to wipe out a certain amount of people,” and that vaccinations “unnaturally interfere with viruses' designs on killing people.” Wow, kinda looks like the “Schmitt” has really hit the fan over at Newsmax. So, they want to “distance” themselves from Schmitt’s remarks, do they? Gee, makes you wonder if the morons who run Newsmax know they actually have the option not hire anti-science nitwits like Schmitt as anchors in the first place? Not to worry though, should Schmitt get fired, I'm sure folks like Kevin McCarthy or Rand Paul would warmly welcome him to become part of their staffs. Of course, the truth is, what Schmitt is really promoting is “Social Darwinism.” Given that, I assume by the same logic he applies to vaccines, one may conclude that by warning people ...

Mike Huckabee Claims COVID-19 Death Risk Small and Sin Risk Lethal

Mike Huckabee Claims COVID-19 Death Risk Small and Sin Risk Lethal: Former Republican presidential candidate Mike Huckabee has stirred some controversy with medical professionals by claiming that the risk of death from coronavirus is very “minimal,” but “sin is 100% lethal. Oh, really Mike? Then how about showing me a death certificate which lists “sin” as the primary cause of death. Of course, the fact is, sin couldn’t be 100% lethal, or a guy like me wouldn’t even be alive to write this. On the other hand, maybe you’re on to something Mike - and sin really is lethal, and I secretly used a “ghostwriter” to write this joke. https://www.johnnyrobishcomedy.com

You've Got to Be Kidding?

Search This Blog