You've Got to Be Kidding?

Televangelist Claims Veggie Burgers are a Satanic Plot to Alter Our DNA: Christian televangelist Rick Wiles is warning his audience that the popularity of plant-based alternatives to meat and dairy products are part of a satanic plot to alter human DNA and create a race of soulless creatures, who will no longer be willing or able to accept Jesus Christ as their personal savior. Wow, and who knew?  Now, while I’m sure some of you are laughing, Pastor Wiles does bring up a valid point.  I mean, when’s the last time you’ve seen someone accepting Jesus Christ as their personal savior - while they were busy gobbling down a veggie burger? Now, some may ask, if Lucifer is nefariously altering the DNA of unsuspecting diners eating veggie burgers - then why doesn’t God just issue some sort of a “software update,” which would repair the poor schmuck’s DNA?  After all, wasn’t God the one who designed these folks in the first place?   Perhaps, but if I’m understanding Past...

More Takeaways From the Trump NY Times Tax Return Bombshell:  Experts say the IRS may scrutinize the legitimacy of many of those personal expenses President Trump claimed as business-related costs, which were cited in the recent bombshell New York Times article - such as $70,000 for haircuts in one year and hefty consulting fees paid to his daughter Ivanka. Well, what I can’t get over is - the $70,000 he claims he spent on his hair.  Good grief, is it just me, or should the real story here read - “Donald Trump was Robbed!”  I mean, who the hell recommended his stylist?  That North Korean guy?  All kidding aside, it’s just insane spending money like that on haircuts!  Why, you don’t see Stephen Miller or Steve Bannon spending 70 grand on their hair. So, it turns out that Trump “the billionaire,” is actually the Trump - the “broke bloke,” who’s a whopping half-billion dollars in debt!  Now, I suppose if there’s anything positive about this “dystopi...

NY Times Report Claims Trump Paid No Taxes 10 of last 15 Years:  According to a Sunday The New York Times report, President Donald Trump paid no federal income taxes at all in 10 of the past 15 years, while paying only $750 in years 2016 and 2017. Of course, Trump is claiming this is nothing more than fake news.  Hell, no kidding?  Well then, it’s a damn shame there isn’t some sort of form or document Trump could release, that would prove beyond a shadow of a doubt the NY Times story is bogus.  You know, a document that would conclusively show Trump paid his fair share in taxes, just like the rest of us - but apparently, documents like that don’t even exist. So, my-oh-my!  To think this poor Trump fellow made so damn little money, that he only had a $750 tax liability?  Why, that must make him just about one the lowest-paid wage earners employed over at Mar-a-Lago.   Hell, my neighbor’s 15-year-old grandson paid more taxes than that, delivering ...

Hundreds Turn Out in Portland for Proud Boys Rally:   Hundreds of extremist, right-wing, white supremacist protesters from the Proud Boys organization, attended demonstrations in Portland, Ore. on Saturday in support of President Trump and his "law and order" reelection campaign. Now, for those of you who are not exactly sure who the hell these Proud Boys are, they kind of remind me of the Village People, only these guys can’t sing.  Frankly, I think “Putin’s Boys” would have been a better choice for a name, but that’s just me.  One thing’s for sure, no one is ever gonna refer to these half-wits as the "Smart Boys.” That said, I do have to admit that rallies like this serve to remind me just how much President Trump is doing to bring the races in our country back together again.  Of course, he’s bringing them back together to beat the hell out of each other, but he’s definitely bringing them back together and - the White House feels that ought to count for somet...

Amy Coney Barrett To Be Trump’s Nominee to Fill Ginsburg Seat:   President Trump has told people around him that he plans to nominate federal appeals court Judge Amy Coney Barrett to fill the Supreme Court vacancy left by the death of Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg.  Judge Barrette is a devote Catholic and a deeply conservative jurist who, for many years described her legal career as being only a means to an end, “and that end is building the Kingdom of God.”  Well, happy days!  I’m sure Judge Barrett will simply be thrilled to accept the President’s nomination for the Supreme Court - that is, assuming her husband says it’s OK.  Of course, as one might expect, selecting someone who holds such deeply religious and partisan views as Judge Barrett, is likely to stir up quite a bit of controversy.    However, let’s remember what President Trump once asked, “what have you got to lose?”  And, the answer is nothing - other than gay marriage, laws protecting...

Vatican Cardinal in Charge of Saint Making Resigns Amid Financial Scandal:   The powerful head of the Vatican’s “saint-making office,” Cardinal Angelo Becciu, resigned suddenly Thursday from his post and renounced his rights as a cardinal, amid an investigation into a shady London real estate financial deal that reportedly implicates him. Well, this is certainly disappointing.  I mean, if you can’t even trust the guy who authenticates if that’s really the Virgin Mary’s image you’re seeing in that piece of burnt toast, who can you trust?  But, gee whiz!  This had to have been the real estate deal from Hell - in order to take down a powerful guy like Becciu.  Anyway, I think we can safely assume that this Becciu character is definitely no saint.   The truth is, Becciu would probably be much better suited in a job identifying devils and demons instead of identifying saints.  And, there should be plenty of work.  After all, there sure seems to ...

Trump Refuses to Commit to Peaceful Transition of Power:   When pressed by a reporter, President Donald Trump refused to commit to a peaceful transition of power should he lose the election in November, saying he needs to “see what happens," and then went into a rant about how there wouldn’t even be a need for a transition, if we didn’t permit mail-in ballots. Now, while this may scare the bejesus out of some of you, I do see his point.  After all, how is a President like Donald Trump supposed to consider this election valid, if people are allowed to vote him right out of office?  Why, that doesn’t make any sense at all.  Who’d be for that? Besides, isn’t it dangerous to change direction in the middle of a huge crisis like a pandemic?  I mean, we already have over 200,000 Americans dead from this “Democrat hoax.”  Isn’t that about enough suffering!   We should thank goodness that we have a President who’s savvy enough to understand this pandemic...